Yes the point you are missing is "how pathetic". This gets on my nerves.

OK, so kids need a father figure - I understand this but SURELY not after he walked out on them too.

What's worse is she decided to TELL you this? I can't imagine how that must've made you feel.

I am embarassed to be male sometimes with shits like him around.

Sorry about that Tim but i think i know why. I used to do this all the time, when i felt i was getting too close to someone. I always thought i wanted a relationship but after a couple of weeks i ALWAYS started to talk about ex's and what they had done/said, etc therefore pushing them away. Although i never actually told any boyfriends i was still in love with any of my ex's.

I think she's scared of getting involved again and obviously not quite ready, but hang on in there. She needs a friend and you never know where that friendship will lead to.

Keep it simple, ........NO lol

Most people don't 'do' closure/endings terribly well. Think funerals, job loss, amputation, the list is endless. I think its because its natural that we dont usually have a plan of action (as it were) for how we are going to cope with the aftermath, no one no matter how hard they try can truly shut off their emotions and be detached - even detachment is an emotion. Breaking up has got to be just about up there with having your leg sawn off with a blunt teaspoon.

But would Plan B not be just a sticking plaster in the short term?

Not rambling manofmayo. I understood (sort of) what you were saying.
My instant thought of what you meant by plan B was in a sense to maybe jump right into another relationship so you didnt have to sit at home crying in yer beer...thats what i meant by a sticking plaster which in the long term never heals a festering open wound....Ultimately I guess the *only* way to deal with a break-up is to face up to it and deal with it, then move on......which is where it all becomes oh so comlicated cuz we don't have a manual or rule book to tell us how to do it surgically and swiftly!