Should i ?

A mates ex-girlfriend of 6 months ago (they lived together for a year) goes to the same gym as me and we have always got on well and made small talk..... recently we have been sending e-mails and become a little closer. I fancy the arse of this girl, always have done, and i think the attraction is mutual, but it would hurt a friend who used to be close a few years back but only see now an then now!!!

How long would you leave it before you asked her out, or would you just not go there ?

You know the rules.

It's basically almost never OK to do it.

If you do, forget about the friend.

If it's possibly True Love, it's possibly worth the risk, but if it's mainly lust . . .

One honourable way is to have a pint with the old mate and suss out/ask what he feels about it.

Yeah....goes something like this 'alright mate' ... 'what you been upto'..... 'England are playing crap arent they'........'mind if i bang your ex missus' !!!

lol.... i know what you are saying tho, its been done to me, hurt at first but you get over it !

This is seriously a no go area!!!!!

Yeah some people with time will let go and move on but others wil be deeply affected by it.
you need to sit down and think is this girl seriously worth risking your friendship for? could you deal with the fact that it could really hurt your friend and ultimatly could lose him forever.
Yeah things may go great for you and this girl, but what happens if 6 months down the line she leaves you and there you are having both lost the girl and a friend.

There is a wise saying. Girls/guys come and go, but friends are there for life!

good luck in whatever you decide, just make sure you think it through 100% before making any drastic decisions

Talk to your friend.

I mean, he can't stop you from seeing her, but still. He will more than likely not be happy about it.

I would only go there if the friend didn't mind too much.

Dude dont even go there. I fell out with my best mate forever when he did it to me, was only 2weeks though. But still its a NO GO area.

Well its official the attraction is mutual !!!

Think we are to just remain good friends tho..... strange really, she has become a closer friend than my mate !!! Sure he will think something is going on, but at least now i know i can look him in the face and say there isn't.
Feels quite good !!
Thankyou all for the comments, you basically confirmed what i deep down already knew !!
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'If you don't know me, don't judge me'

Friends are good(although i'm not seeing much evidence of that lately..)

Why dont the 3 of you get together and have a 3 some, that way no one gets hurt...erm Im not being very helpfull am I....sorry.

No thanks..... all for threesomes but not with a mate, too weird !!!
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'If you don't know me, don't judge me'

True...

You may have seen in my post in advice, i just had this done to me, Just want to say well done for putting your mate first. Should be proud of yourself fella.