Hiya all,

I broke up with my girlfriend about a month ago, and i can honestly say it's the first one i've ever really really loved, like.. i'd do anything for her. It hurt me so much I just felt like curling up in a corner and dying at first. Never ever have i felt feelings like this. It makes me realise how powerful love is.

I think what made it worse for me is my ex had a child, I was with her from when he was 2 months old and i was bringing him up as my own, and honestly did bond with him. First woman i've ever went this far with and i was so devoted to her.

I must admit the last few days i've been feeling better about the whole thing, but i still think about the past a lot. Little things remind me of it all, like.. i can't even look at a woman pushing a pram down the street without thinking about her/the baby.

At first we tried the whole friends thing out but i really found this dificult and have had to slowly fade this out as it was just making me hurt even more. I just thought i'd share my story with everyone else, my opinion of love has changed completely after realizing just how powerful it is and it sure isn't a word to just be thrown around!

If anyone else has gone through similar situations i'd like to hear from you! Looking to the future now.. hopefull i'll meet someone who will love me for me, and not use me for what i do for them.

Hi Craig, most of us here have very simular storys so you are not on your own here..... I have just very recantly had a little blip in my life where i was very down about it all....but it does get better given time and i am sure you will one day find love again! as you are still very young and have your whole life infront of you.
Good luck for the future.
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Yeah man sorry to hear about that i know exactly how you feel.

It does take time, trust me and you will be okay

Hang in there my man
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you know you'll get over the breakup in time..... that's fact. non negotiable.

but...what about the child... how old was he? how long were you his "father" for? can you just forget him?

i think if you bonded with this child as you said you have... you are feeling more than the usual strains of a broken relationship. maybe...just maybe... if you asked her... she'd let you see the child once a week? take him to the park or to feed the ducks? this child may think of you as his father and may be confused and in mourning himself.

Well.. not all that long I guess, Long for me though as only really had 2 serious relationships. I was with her for 9 months, The baby was 2 months old when we got together and 11months when we split so, I guess in a way he's too young to know but it still hurts me as I was playing the father figure, getting up in the night for his feeds, taking him out, etc... according to my ex i didn't do enough!! She wanted everything doing for her i think.

I think what you are saying is right almostpurrfect, It does hurt more for me as there was a child involved, I completely changed my way of life when i met her.. I mean before meeting her I had no responsobilities whatsoever. I'd get drunk most weekends, partying away! I pretty much dropped all my mates and my entire social life to be with her.

I don't wanna go on about it though, really don't wanna bore you all!

btw almostpurrrfect: nice pic, cutie!

tyvm

the saying is true... "Time heals all wounds"

and in time, perhaps you might wonder what you were doing with her to begin with. she sounds a right stroppy, selfish girl. but think on my suggestion for seeing the child..... it may turn out to be the best thing you ever do.......

No exactly how you are feeling, was with a ex for 2 years, we lived together for a year of that,strange thing about my expierience though was although we both loved each other, during the relationship she was more in love with me than i was with her (so i thought) and we had split a few times,mostly due to me getting fed up with the relationship, but it was never for long and we always got back together. Our last break up again i hadint really made the effort to prevent it but this time she did not try to fix the situation, after about a month i really started to miss her and made the attempt to get back with her. She was having none of it - fed up with my shit i suppose, i know our situation is completley different has this was all my fault but i do know how you feel. I had a really difficult time getting over her as i really did love her and would have done anything for her,but i took her forgranted.

So i learned the hard way that it is true what they say, you dont know what youve got til its gone.

I'm not one for big speeches and do's and dont's all i can say is time IS a healer .. give it time ... and all will be fine

No of course not ??

not i just meant without going into the arse of things ... time IS a healer.

Thanks for all the feedback people! I know what you are all saying.. time IS a healer i totally agree, It's been about 1.5 Months since the break-up now and i must admit it is getting better and better as each day goes on. I work all week so that takes my mind off things. I've also got back in touch with a lot of old friends and have been out on the town a couple of times.. getting back into the way life was before i met her. I appreciate what you are saying about seeing the child still, I will suggest that too her, It's his 1st birthday coming up next month and i sure as hell intend on getting him something

good for you!!!!!!

there's more to being a parent than DNA.