No, dont give up .. you just have to give it some time .. also posting on the forums will let your personality shine through

the problem u got is the way things work in reality is very different to how it works in theory. yes sending a polite reasonable message should work but it doesnt. You have to bear in mind women get deluged with messages, unless you can instantly appeal AND u have a look about you they like they aint got time to find out whether they might like you.

the other option is to sit and wait, which takes time and patience. Since most dating sites work by people seeing your picture the importance of a good picture cannot be underestimated. Its the first point of contact. You could be their perfect m8 but a bad picture and they'll just walk past. Now what makes a good picture is prob a can of worms but I'd say light so they can see you, more than your head so they can see what the rest of you is like. Head shots can be surprisingly deceptive as to what the body is like. Smiling, so you look happy. I can't do forced smiles so im done for in that respect. I'm not sure what else. we should have a discussion about it on another thread. After that it just comes down to whether they like the look of you . there's no accounting for taste.

so then u got the best pic u can get then u got to get the profile right cos if they're reading your profile you're in with a chance.

its very easy to put people off. No matter what u say a given percentage will see somthing they don't like. Its very difficult, believe me ive tried. No matter how bad it sounds you are trying to manipulate people. Selling is a form of manipulation and online dating is selling yourself.

There's two ways you can do it either be specific about things in the full knowledge that people will see stuff they dont like the sound of and go away or be general and hope to impress people with your qualities without saying what they are.

the second one works better for me because i have interests that people dont understand/like the sound of or they've never heard of and people always want to feel they have things in common.

after that its just a numbers game. there's way more men and a lot less women, to get the most amount of women "checking u out" u have to get on every free dating/social networking site u can find and prob the biggest paying one.

u can still do it the other way as well as well but as u realise its very hard. best chance u have there is to make some witty comment about something on their profile. that way they know 1) you read their profile 2)you have a brain 3)you can make them laugh. 4)you're not like the 10000 other men that just said "hi" or other displeasing things. Still its not easy with what little some women write, you're back to chatting women up in the pub territory. Im hopeless at that.




seems like i've thought about this way too much. thats just me. always having to know how stuff works.