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Home >> Dating >> Still confused!
14.03.2007, 21:22 quote
Hallo peeps! Im looking for a bit of friendly advice once again! I actually think this thread has been on before but, hey!
Dating....
The big confusion of my life!
So, you go on a date or two with a girl. Nothing happens on these dates but pleasantries, few drinks etc...
1.How many times a week r u supposed to then contact them?
2.Would u wait for them to contact you at any point?
3.Is there any reason to get paranoid at this stage that they wouldnt want to see you again?
4.In texts, should u get too heavy to start with, or just be very brief, with a "how r u"?
5.Various unsure things are happening to me at the moment! So is there any tips to my dating woes, like, take it as it comes, or wait for them to make the next move, or, pursue them more, or what?
6.If they seem interested from the start, does that mean move quickly?
Any answers would be great, please from a hopeless/inexperienced at dating person lol 
14.03.2007, 21:26 quote
You know what I would do ...
What you just typed out ... say to her.
If she is a decent woman she will admire your honesty and also she will know exactly where she stands with you.
Thats what I would do.
14.03.2007, 21:28 quote
I would agree with decent guy here, if you are sat here thinking all this , she is probably sat thinking the same.
14.03.2007, 21:28 quote
Well i'm not one for playing games....
If you like her txt her!
Whats the point in wanting to contact her and waiting??
Dont really think there are any rules....
If she likes you and shes interested she will be happy to speak to you....
If shes not that interested than I guess you'll know from her responses (or lack of)
But then.....what do I know 
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14.03.2007, 21:33 quote
| Cazzabee wrote: |
| Before I answer, I take it you still havent texted her yet then??? |
Yes i did, and it went like this
me:" Hey, hows you?, saw you online today but i thought would send u a text to say hi! week going good? Im off to the pub again tonight lol! Hope your ok? x"
Her: " hey im good, just got in from gym, was online checking my messages(freedating site). been to an agency looking for extra work. Enjoy the pub."
And that was that! After, i sent a text saying, well, text me soon eh? (that was after she said we should go out soon on the date on monday.
I just thought her txt was very plain and also mentioned her "messages" !
Me being paranoid?
14.03.2007, 21:42 quote
I can see why your confussed. Does seem a bit strange to mention dating site messages!! I think (and this is just my opinion) that she may be trying to play some mindgames with you or letting you know that she is keeping her options open. If you want to then leave it for now but text her over the weekend and ask her if she fancies going out again. And then see what happens during a real convo rather than just a text one
14.03.2007, 21:42 quote
Personally I wouldn't mention seeing her online, she might feel like she's being watched or that you're wondering who else she's dating off the internet.
Have met up with one guy online and it concerned me afterwards...he can SEE when I'm checking my messages...prob thinks I've got a man in every port...
Re. 'The Rules': there are none - or there shouldn't be - just go with your natural instinct 
14.03.2007, 21:44 quote
| Cazzabee wrote: |
| I can see why your confussed. Does seem a bit strange to mention dating site messages!! I think (and this is just my opinion) that she may be trying to play some mindgames with you or letting you know that she is keeping her options open. If you want to then leave it for now but text her over the weekend and ask her if she fancies going out again. And then see what happens during a real convo rather than just a text one |
No, its like i saw her online on a dating site that we met on. But instead of messaging on there, said i sent her a text. But it seemed strange that she would still be checking her messages if she has started to date me! But theni guess i wouldnt have been on there either! Oh i dont know
14.03.2007, 21:50 quote
| Mewler wrote: |
| Personally I wouldn't mention seeing her online, she might feel like she's being watched or that you're wondering who else she's dating off the internet.
Have met up with one guy online and it concerned me afterwards...he can SEE when I'm checking my messages...prob thinks I've got a man in every port... Re. 'The Rules': there are none - or there shouldn't be - just go with your natural instinct |
Thats good advice, do you think i scared her off now then?
14.03.2007, 21:52 quote
| Twobitactor wrote: | ||
No, its like i saw her online on a dating site that we met on. But instead of messaging on there, said i sent her a text. But it seemed strange that she would still be checking her messages if she has started to date me! But theni guess i wouldnt have been on there either! Oh i dont know |
Yeah it's a conundrum isn't it, but you have only been out once (am I right?), until you're in an established relationship I think, fair play, tbh.
You could chat about this but it would sound really heavy and bunny-boilerish if after one date you told her you didn't like her being on the dating sites.
14.03.2007, 21:58 quote
| Cazzabee wrote: |
| Wouldnt say so cos if you saw her then she saw you didnt she?? |
Yeah, u could say that!
I dunno, it must sound like im really hapless at this dating thing! I think my main issue, is that i dont actually have much experience in it, and that, how often do people meet when they first start dating, (saying that they decide to do it again) I know theres probably no rules, unless you fall madly in love on the first date, but that doesnt happen does it? lol!
Feeling very unsure about me at the moment, surely i should be happy im dating shouldnt i?
14.03.2007, 22:04 quote
| Twobitactor wrote: | ||
Yeah, u could say that! I dunno, it must sound like im really hapless at this dating thing! I think my main issue, is that i dont actually have much experience in it, and that, how often do people meet when they first start dating, (saying that they decide to do it again) I know theres probably no rules, unless you fall madly in love on the first date, but that doesnt happen does it? lol! Feeling very unsure about me at the moment, surely i should be happy im dating shouldnt i? |
You have only been on the 1 date though so it is still all up in the air....just ask her if she wants to do it again by saying so you fancy going out for a drink again sometime soon or something along those lines
14.03.2007, 22:07 quote
| Cazzabee wrote: | ||||
You have only been on the 1 date though so it is still all up in the air....just ask her if she wants to do it again by saying so you fancy going out for a drink again sometime soon or something along those lines |
Yeah your right cazz, thanks. I suppose i like her, but dont wanna do the pressuring thing to scare her off, i think if i dont hear from her after weekend, will maybe ring to say hi, and up for something soon?
Mmmm? Silly me!!!
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