Dear Flirtbox

Assume you have a date; it’s your first physical meeting with someone.

You’ve agreed where and what time to meet and also agreed to let each other know if one is going to be late.

How long would you wait before you go the hump and buggered off?

I reckon 5 minutes is OK; 10 minutes without a call or text is taking the piss a bit, and after 15 minutes I’d go off and do my own thing, cos I’d be too annoyed to spend any time with that person if they did turn after 15 minutes late without letting me know.

(Incidentally, it seems that the other person turned up 2 minutes later than the 15 minutes, after me and my 2-legged companion got the hump and went off on our own to chase rabbits and have a fag on a bench)

I remain
Yours most irritably
Pebbles The Dog (Miss)

Well if i had been in the same position, i would have called to check they were on there way.

A valid point, I suppose.

But what if an hour before the arranged meeting time they said they were definitely coming?

In my mind, one should never ever be late for a first meeting, always early. If they aren’t there on time and haven’t let you know they are going to be late (heavy traffic, etc – c’mon, even then it is easy enough to finds somewhere to pull over and send a quick text or make a quick call), I assume they’ve stood me up or have disrespected me by not letting me know they’re running late. Or maybe I’m just not desperate enough to hang around waiting endlessly for someone who might turn out to be Miss Never Punctual?

Maximum i'd wait would be 30 min! That is standing waiting like a plonker! I would hover around the immediate vicinity and keep lookin out for an arrival so to speak!

Last time i did dating like this was in the days when mobiles were like bricks and not everybody had them! Now adays i'd be inclined to ring up to do a quick check of an imminent arrival!
_________________
This guy is liscensed to chill, and thrill, but the opportunities to thrill are rather less than anticipated!!!!

The bit about soliciting has always worried me! PC Plod can always be a bit over zealous when it comes to meeting his targets! So i always try to ensure that there is at least something to look at whilst waiting!
_________________
This guy is liscensed to chill, and thrill, but the opportunities to thrill are rather less than anticipated!!!!

I think I would wait 15 minutes if it was not in London. If it was in London then i would wait half hour because if she was on the tube then she wouldnt be able to tell me she was held up. But I agree that if you are going to be late for a date then it is your duty to let the person who is waiting for you know as soon as you can. Having said this, I would wait the 15 minutes then go find a coffee shop or a bar and have a drink before I fucked off, just in case there was a good reason for her not to contact, such as having her arms accidentally amputated by the closing doors of a tube train at Covent Garden station

I have more tolerance than most people, but do you know what? it would have to be a different amount of time for each situation as there are too many variables.
Things to take into account:-
.travelling on public transport/amount of
connections/special buses
.underground having no mobile reception for most of it
so unable to ring about delays
.getting lost if it's a new area
.do you have to stand somewhere in the pouring rain or have you chosen to meet somewhere that's comfortable
.car breakdown
.forgot to bring their phone/or number with them

I'm pretty sure that many of you can add a few more to my list.
I use public transport and if you have several changes, each changeover place can have a long delay yet if all your connections are on time you can end up waiting for the date for a couple of hours, 'cos you'd left early enough to allow for the probs.

Don't think I'd wait more than an hour unless it was somewhere that I wanted to be anyway, in which case I'd leave a message at the door/reception and pop out to check if my date had turned up, but just carry on with my evening.

Well I'd pick a venue where I don't mind hanging about. Then I could make some use of the rest of the day, maybe. Meh, I have little to fill my life at the best of times

I'm with Sue on this, half an hour normally but it does depend on circumstances as to how long. Consistency would be the deciding factor for me, if she is always late then I see it as lack of enthusiasm.

Having said that, I always call if I am running late for some reason. It's very rare for me to do it and I normally give myself more than enough time to get there but you can't always foretell traffic conditions, public transport delays and such.

One thing we are all dismissing! Isn't it the female preojective (spelling? I need a new dictionary ) to be late? I have waited 30 mins max at a meeting place before now! As the others say what would count as a valid reason for a long delay?

I also do not write someone off due to a delay/missed date i believe in second chances
_________________
This guy is liscensed to chill, and thrill, but the opportunities to thrill are rather less than anticipated!!!!

I think the main 2 points for Mr Darkhorse are 1) he genuinely believes that one should never, ever be late for that all-important first meeting without telling the other person - one should leave more than enough time to arrive on time (even early - after all, he/she who arrives first gets to be the watcher, rather than the watchee ) and 2) after being left standing waiting for an indefinite length of time doesn't do much for his mood, so it'd be a pretty tense date even if he did wait around (for say 30 minutes, as seems to be general consensus here).

On the whole, Mr Darkhorse has lots of patience and tolerance - after all, he spent at least 4 hours walking around town shopping with a lady friend on Saturday and enjoyed it, unlike some men - but there are some things that are just unacceptable to him (moving goalposts is another one of the few dislikes that he has)

I agree with Stu. If there was no text or phone call I would probably leave after 15 minutes of waiting.

It's common courtesy to be on time, especially if it's a first date. If I arrive on time for a date then I expect the person I'm meeting to do the same.
_________________
I'm a humble person...I'm really much greater than I think I am!