Mummy mummy!! Daddy's bleeding and keeps falling over.
Shut up child and reload my shotgun.

Why did God invent men?
Because vibrators cant mow the lawn.

What does it mean when a man moans and whispers your name?
You haven't used enough pressure on the pillow over his face.

What do you call a man with half a brain?

Gifted.



What should you give a man who has everything?

A woman to show him how to work it.


Why are all dumb blonde jokes one-liners?

So men can understand them.

What did God say after creating man?
I can do better.