did you hear about the magic tractor?

it turned into a field

Q. How do you stop a workmate having an affair with your wife?

A. Tell him you've divorced her and he can now marry her.


Three men talking in a bar.

One says, "I have the best wife in the world. She always has a dinner waiting for me when I get home, she knows when the footy is on and switches channels just so I can watch it."

The second one says, "I have the best wife. She does all that and even gives me head before I go to sleep every night."

The third chimes in, "I have a much better wife."

The first man replies, "but you're not married!"

"Exactly." Came the response.