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Home >> Sex >> How many is too many?

05.08.2008, 12:34 quote

eda85

Personally I'd be shocked if I found out that my partner had more than 3 exes

 
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05.08.2008, 13:46 quote

CMISO
CMISO Joined: 18 Jun 2007 Posts: 3113 Location: United Kingdom, England, Lincolnshire
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rocketgirl wrote:
I knew a guy who had been married 4 times, with several kids apiece, he was only 34 at the time, yet he was adamant he would only ever sleep with a woman he loved, never outside the marriage/s. Seemed to me he was a bit clueless really, one marriage didnt last 3 months. I thought maybe he was just getting married to make it 'morally right',according to his own code. Confused


Wedding cake addiction is a terrible thing.
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05.08.2008, 17:09 quote

chikhai

rocketgirl wrote:
Interesting point. Do you think then that its a matter of pride? Especially blokes who dont like to think that their woman has had many previous partners?
Or would that not hold true so much these days, as most people would not expect (or get) a virgin, and feel good about being 'the first'. (and hoping, 'the last').
Might someone think that many previous partners equates with that person not being too choosy about who they share their body with, or is the body not considered sacrosanct?


Its definitely pride. Not many men would freely admit to being involved with the village bike (so to speak). More fool them.

Nobody has innate talent when it comes to the bedroom, and if that is what you're looking for then you're not going to get it from a virgin or someone who has stayed with the same partner from the year dot. Okay, you might with the latter, but its highly unlikely.

I don't consider the body sacrosanct at all. I've got a pretty deterministic view when it comes to sex; the body is there to be enjoyed. Yes, sex can transcend the usual biological compulsions when theres love involved, but thats not to say the act in itself isn't enjoyable. People always say 'oh but you can't enjoy it if its not with someone you love', bollocks. Theres nothing wrong with mindless sex, you do it when you have a wank, and you don't see many people complaining about that do you? And I'm pretty sure the oldest profession in the world would argue that theres nothing wrong with physical liasons with someone you have absolutely no emotional involvement with.

Given the choice I'd take the whore over the angel any day of the week. I've been involved with both extremes and I can safely say which one I enjoyed the most. Sex is a big part of a relationship with me and if we don't gel in the bedroom then won't progress very far. That might sound shallow, but when you get down to it on a nuts & bolts level, sex and intimacy are the main reasons we look for a partner. If that fundamental level of a relationship doesn't work then you're only going to have trouble further down the line. So if finding someone with a good track record is going to secure that basic requirement then it wouldn't matter how many people they'd slept with.

 
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05.08.2008, 17:18 quote

rocketgirl

"People always say 'oh but you can't enjoy it if its not with someone you love', bollocks"

Well, yes that must be bollocks for lots of people, because lots of people love one-night-stands.

That probably really equates with "shouldn't, because thats how society/family has brought us up" rather than meaning "can't"? Or 'won't consider enjoying it without love". Or simply don't get the pleasure (emotionally) that they seek if love is not involved?

 
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05.08.2008, 17:51 quote

eda85

rocketgirl wrote:
"People always say 'oh but you can't enjoy it if its not with someone you love', bollocks"

Well, yes that must be bollocks for lots of people, because lots of people love one-night-stands.

That probably really equates with "shouldn't, because thats how society/family has brought us up" rather than meaning "can't"? Or 'won't consider enjoying it without love". Or simply don't get the pleasure (emotionally) that they seek if love is not involved?


Bang on once again. Are you gonna publish these pearls one day?

 
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05.08.2008, 18:08 quote

rocketgirl

Just questions, I'm not making any factual statements here, just rambling thoughts.
Actually, I could publish a book called "Conundrums: How to disappear down your own navel" and just have printed on the pages within a whole list of all these questions, get the reader to answer each one themselves.....then at the end of the book I could give my phone number and list of charges for psychotherapy.

 
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05.08.2008, 18:44 quote

eda85

Sometimes the best answers are just more questions. A sort of socratic method

 
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07.09.2008, 22:14 quote

3mma
3mma Joined: 06 Sep 2008 Posts: 2 Location: United Kingdom, England, Norfolk
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i wouldnt have to much of a problem with it, intersting point tho as most of the replys talk about a girl being a slapper and no mention of the men who usually are a lot worse at sleeping around then the women

 
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08.09.2008, 12:55 quote

snaithman

Not a problem if they were to remain faithul whilst with me. The last point is a fair comment though.

 
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08.09.2008, 13:00 quote

chikhai

3mma wrote:
...no mention of the men who usually are a lot worse at sleeping around then the women


Any proof? Or just pandering to the stereotype?

 
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08.09.2008, 14:17 quote

rocketgirl

chikhai wrote:
3mma wrote:
...no mention of the men who usually are a lot worse at sleeping around then the women


Any proof? Or just pandering to the stereotype?


Sounds like a stereotype to me.
If the men are sleeping around more than the women are, then arent the men all sharing the same few women? Which makes those women more promiscuous than those men? Or am I missing something?

 
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15.09.2008, 21:56 quote

xxkimiexx
xxkimiexx Joined: 14 Sep 2008 Posts: 90 Location: United Kingdom, England, Worcestershire
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I dont do the one night stand things.
Never have..and i dont plan to (obviously cant say i NEVER will..but the intention is not there)
And when i like someone i make them wait.(im not talking years lol)
If they cant, then they're not worth it. In my opinion anyway.
I think its more special that way Smile

 
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15.09.2008, 21:58 quote

jambojam

xxkimiexx wrote:
I dont do the one night stand things.
Never have..and i dont plan to (obviously cant say i NEVER will..but the intention is not there)
And when i like someone i make them wait.(im not talking years lol)
If they cant, then they're not worth it. In my opinion anyway.
I think its more special that way Smile


Well said Very Happy

 
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15.09.2008, 22:00 quote

Hugglies
Hugglies Joined: 21 Aug 2006 Posts: 2478 Location: United Kingdom, England, London
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Its always better to get something you really 'want'

rather than being handed it on a plate
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15.09.2008, 22:03 quote

rocketgirl

Hugglies wrote:
Its always better to get something you really 'want'

rather than being handed it on a plate


Yes but to stick to the topic ahem hugglies Laughing Laughing How many 'wants' is too many?

 
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