From the horses mouth...

John Prescott

CzaCza Gabor

Chubby Brown

Margaret Thatcher

Jeremy Clarkson

Paris Hilton (well got to have one Chav at least)

Did you know that Chatham and Basildon councils are due to hold a meeting to discuse twinning the two great Chav towns of Kent & Essex! God forgive us!

nice one!

How many women does it take to tile a bathroom???

2 if you slice em thin enough!

If your partner is overweight encourage them to walk 3 miles every day... after a week the fat bugger will be 21 miles away!

what have illegal immigrants and sperm got in common ?

thousands of them get in but only one works!

all that for that!

What do you call the useless piece of skin around the penis?... a man!

ok... went down to the wreck and ripped open a container... just my luck 50 immigrants fell out!

But I'ts clean!

Johny and his best mate Billy were in the playground when Johny noticed that Billy had a brand new watch on his wrist, "where d'ya get that"? he asked " dad bought it for me" " ...