When thurs a test in ma wee class
They look tae me tae come in last
While thur aw spellin words oot loud,
Ahm makin faces in a cloud
They’re aw sat there hypnotized,
When a want tae see thum look surprised,
Instead they look at me like ahm dumb,
When I staun in ma chair n shout oot “BUM”
Then the teacher grabs me by the ear,
An ma hearts pure racin, mad wi fear
(It’s no the furst wan ae ma crimes,
Ah’ve hud ma last chance hunners a times)
She says “Listen, ah’ve hud enough a you,
So here’s whit ah’m gonnae do,
Ah’m phoning yer mother fur a chat
Aboot Attention Deficit … “Here, whit’s that …”

Due to the actions of your son,
We’ve reached the point of no return
Imaginative and highly strung
He’s considered a fool by everyone.
Now drugs are one of many ways
To cure a child of this malaise
But I tell you now I rue the day,
They took our canes and belts away.
She gies him a look that wid wet yer pants
Shocked an outraged aw at wance
Yous er jist a shower a mugs,
Wantin tae pit ma son oan drugs
But this has goat beyond a joke
Ma guilt is giein me the boak,
Ah says “Maybe they know whit they’re daein
Aboot Attention Deficit … “but forgoat whit ah wus sayin”.


We’ve ran some test and took some scans,
As a result of these here are our plans.
First the red pill, then the blue
(For God’s sake don’t confuse the two)
Taking these we think you’ll find
Will still his nerves and dull his mind
And that, I think you will agree
Is the kind of thing we’d like to see
No more staring at the skies,
He’ll see through apathetic eyes.
And one day soon we will at last,
Consign emotion to the past.
There’s nothing left for you to fear,
This boy will be a pioneer,
Surely we will kill or cure,
His Attention Deficit … “Ah wusnae listening any mair”.

Nowadays when thur’s a test,
They look tae me tae dae the best
The teacher says ahm daein great,
Ah finally learnt tae concentrate
Ah take my pills at wan wi skoosh,
Dae extra sums tae gies a push,
But ahm no allowed they sugary snacks,
It’s aw work n no play for jack
No more staring at the clouds,
Or saying anything out loud,
And no more stauning oan ma chair,
Whit’s the problem wi the flair?
An me an ma maw don’t huv tae row,
Seeing as ahm a good boay now,
And aw ma pills are oan repeat order,
Fur Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder.
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“The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time"

That was excellent Gary, Was both amusing and thoughtful. My eldest has OCD (borderline autistic). I don't want her on pills and she's old enough at 17 to make that choice herself now. For all that her behaviour has driven me to the brink, I don't want to lose who she is. When she's not driving me and her sister to distraction, she's happy, bubbly, bouyant and a joy to be around. I'll live with the bad, negative noise, just so that I can enjoy the pleasure of the happy, positive noise

I wrote that poem a couple of years ago, and only just performed it along with the other one i posted at an event in Glasgow yesterday. Glad that someone who'd life is touched by someone elses condition found something good in it. I'm actually reading a number of books on subjects like OCD and autisim right now (Thinking in Pictures by Temple Grandin is a phenomenal insight into the autistic mind, as she's autistic herself, and also a world renowned designer of animal slaughter devices, read it to make sense of that one) and find them endlessly fascinating subjects.

In the end, the drug issue generally boils down to "while it improve your wuality of life" and "will you still be the same person". In oliver sacks book "An Anthropoligist on Mars" there's a guy with Tourettes referred to as Witty Ticky Ray, who's a maelstrom of tics and jerks, who takes holidays from his drugs to enjoy the experience of his tourettes, becasue it makes him quick witted, adventurous, un-inhibited, and fun. Kinda like the reasons some people take illegal drugs ... or drink alcohol for that matter. In the end, i'm yet to be convinced there's succh a thing as "normal" anyway. And giving kids drugs because they are "mentally ill" seems to miss a glaring point, kids are all mentally ill, if you apply the same criteria as you do for adults. Illogical, extrover, prone to emotional outbursts in public, pathologically egotistical ... it's the parents and then the systems role to eliminate these characteristics before adulthood .... tho that is a rather cynical and half joking vieew.

Anyway, i hope things work out for your sitster and her treatment. Has she tried any therapy for it? Exposure therapy, withdrawal of reassurance? That could also help ....

Cheers
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“The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time"