(a short poem by A R Ammons)

One failure on
Top of another.
_________________
Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air.
(Jack Benny)

You could even add this updated re-post to that!

An ode to settling a brand new internet-dating debt:

Oh fuel and mobile phone debt, thou art no more.
In full and final payment art thou settled.
And I shalt nae again run off fuel to meet a strumpet/wh*re...
From the Net - even though she may have been fine fettled
Unless she pays my fuel and phone bill in advance
And via verbal contract to do so doth agree
To cover all my costs immediately on my arrival, on my giving a welcoming, happy glance
Into the eyes of yet another internet psycho who - within hours - will drive me to insanity.
But low... the tenner (£) minimum shalt go to ease the sting of yet again being trouser-snake-led internet-dating nettled!