There once was a fellow named Dave,
Who dug up a whore from her grave,
She was mouldy as shit,
And missing a tit,
But think of the money he saved.........

I've been inspired to add one -

There was a young woman who begat
Triplets, named Nat, Pat and Tat
She had fun in the breeding
But then in the feeding
Discovered she had no tit for Tat!

You've probably all heard it before but I love it.....

There once was a woman from Alton
Who knew there was something she'd forgotten
When she read the poetry
written by Paganpoetry
She suddenly remembered the half-written letter and never mind trying to write limericks!

It will be quicker by far
If I jump in my car
And drive up to Lancs
then you can say thanks
for my half-written letter
Cuz in person is better
instead of me
writing poetry
cuz I dont have the time
to make it all rhyme
and i'm pretty rubbish at it anyway!

Here's another homemade one for paganpoetry.......

There was once a woman from Lancs
Who asked a bloke from Devon for spanks
She pulled down her drawers
And got on all fours
And burnt her knees on the carpet

That's alright, yours and PP's little secret is safe with me, not sure about the big mouth other flirtbox members though.....

And I apologise unresevedly to megalone for hijacking his Dave thread