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Home >> Love & Relationships >> Friends with an ex?

12.05.2010, 21:42 quote

whysoserious1983
whysoserious1983 Joined: 31 Mar 2009 Posts: 3629 Location: United Kingdom, England, Gloucestershire
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arieljade4 wrote:
I don't understand why people would want to, clearly desperate for friends. As long as you're friends with an ex, you haven't really moved on and neither have they. So in my opinion, when somebody says, "It's over, but we can still be friends", they're not ready for you to not be part of their life. It's actually quite selfish - when you think about it.


Wrong, wrong and wrong! Just wrong.
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26.05.2010, 15:18 quote

groovyme

whysoserious1983 wrote:
arieljade4 wrote:
I don't understand why people would want to, clearly desperate for friends. As long as you're friends with an ex, you haven't really moved on and neither have they. So in my opinion, when somebody says, "It's over, but we can still be friends", they're not ready for you to not be part of their life. It's actually quite selfish - when you think about it.


Wrong, wrong and wrong! Just wrong.


Why?

Seems rational to me.

You simply can't move backwards, you will always be friends with that added intimacy and that can create tension and awkward moments. It can also be awkward for future mates.

Why bother? There are billions of people to be friends with, why carry on with those who have baggage attached?

 
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26.05.2010, 15:42 quote

gypsymoon
gypsymoon Joined: 17 Jan 2010 Posts: 2565 Location: United Kingdom, England, Norfolk
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I don't think that people who were lovers and are now friends haven't moved on. Surely, if they are still friends that shows that they had a true and special friendship but recognised that being partners and lovers wasn't for them. I would say that there was less of a threat to any new relationship than other friends they each had.
Obviously, if there was a one sided end to a relationship then being friends may not work, but if it's mutually ended then why not?
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26.05.2010, 15:50 quote

groovyme

gypsymoon wrote:
I don't think that people who were lovers and are now friends haven't moved on. Surely, if they are still friends that shows that they had a true and special friendship but recognised that being partners and lovers wasn't for them. I would say that there was less of a threat to any new relationship than other friends they each had.
Obviously, if there was a one sided end to a relationship then being friends may not work, but if it's mutually ended then why not?


There are people who think that way, for sure. To me there is simply too much baggage, and it almost always signals a threat to future mates.

Why bother? If the friendship was that special it never would have gone on to anything else or ended as far as I am concerned.

To each their own.

 
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15.02.2011, 04:47 quote

studdedheels
studdedheels Joined: 10 Feb 2011 Posts: 3 Location: Sweden, ,
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It is definitely possible to be friends with an ex. Or at least not be enemies... Smile

Sleeping with them is fine too, just try not to hurt anyone (including yourself).

 
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