im big sometimes i feel that my curves are sexy mostly i hate it a everyone on here knows i have tried everything going and have just gone to slimming world, dropped ten pounds in the past two weeks and definitly starting to feel more attractive even though i have a long way to go

i dont have confidence in myself though, i rarely even wear make up hence deana offering to help me with my make up on the meet - cheers hun

confidence makes someone beautiful as well as many other things such as compassion love tolerance kindness understanding

not being arrogant as thats not attractive but i have all of the above but confidence and i dont feel beautiful ... i think confidence tops it off

i dont think it is do with fat or thin big or small it is hwo someone is made up and the kind of qualities someone has not what society has dictated to us

even the most externally stunning person can be ugly and rotton inside
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FoxyHan - Proof that it's not all grim up north

I think you look beautiful without make-up Hannah, but I know where you're coming from. Confidence has to come from the inside to be sustained, but I do believe that there are ways to work from the outside inwards and until it triggers the inner confidence.
If you like, it's a bit like a clown or a false confidence in the beginning, a clown will have a painted smile when it may be sad inside...if you know what I mean. However, start to make the best of all your assets, with the help from friends who know you, and professionals who know how.
Most department stores do free makeovers to boost their sales, so you can go and get some free pampering and learn more about how to make the best of your features. I've never had pressure to buy their products when I've had this done so it's a good start.
Taking an new interest in fashion and trying on loads of things that you wouldn't have thought would suit you, often throws up some surprising new looks.
So if you're made up and dressed well, the next thing is to adopt a 'smile', try to think of funny stories or events and you'll develop a real smile that others will respond to, then avoid being in the company of 'negative thinking people'.
When the compliments come flowing as you'll be looking 'stunning', accept them with grace and gradually you'll come to accept the new you and your confidence ON THE INSIDE will grow and create a better sense of self.
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thankyou mirrorpool and kingpin

i have done the department store makeover thing and its ok when they do it but when i do it and it dont matter how much practice i have had it looks wrong

i live in jeans and t shirts polo shirts horsey things im a country girl who lives on a farm i did buy a new top for the meet which is bit plungy and sparkly hopefully it looks good x
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FoxyHan - Proof that it's not all grim up north

Aww Hannah you're gona look lovely for the meet I'm sure.
Sorry I forgot about your country living but make sure you're not making excuses for WHY NOT, when it could be maybe 'I will' So how do you dress for work?
When I moved to the coast, the majority of people would be dressed in casual clothing for beach or hiking and I thought it would be so easy for me to end up just 'not bothering'. As I'm plump, baggy T-shirts would do me no favours even though comfortable. So I made a decision that I would continue to wear my usual look which is 'smart' casual, pretty feminine blouses and trousers or jeans. I still have protective clothing for the wind and rain but I feel good.
I spent years of being too busy with everybody else to care enough for myself, so now, putting on make- up is symbollic for me having 'time for myself now'. I used to wear clothes 10 years out of date without even realising. I know these things don't make the person, but they can make you feel different so you can sort of think yourself into a 'new you'.
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Hannah, you are not the only one... I also don't do the make up thing... I'll wear a bit of mascara.. but that's it. Although I did go to Chata Romana's Workshop a while back, and I could not believe the difference make-up can do...that's if you apply it right... but yeah.. still not for me though...

Which preference on size one has in their mind and what happens in life are often quite different.

As many here will know from reading my posts over the past year and more is that in my *mind* I have this preference for waifish, skinny women with few curves, and small breasts (if any more elaboration is wanted, either with very, very short hair, or a wild mane…..but I digress…..as usual…..)

Now, having said that, this is not pre-requisite and certainly not the be-all and end-all on my shopping list! When I meet someone, I see her as a person, not as a shape, size, or colour.

In fact, the current Mrs Darkhorse is a delightfully robust woman, with lots of delicious curves (which I hope she won't mind me saying, even though she may never read this), and I am very happy with her just the way she is, thank you very much

I think, and from experience. In general men accept and are attracted to fat women much more them women are to fat men. Normally when a woman say they like big men, that normally means 6 foot plus and muscle. Of course not many people are attracted to grossly over weight people. But I think in general, some men accept fat more then women.

I have known men that like Moose, are attracted to a bit of fat on a women. But not sure I have known many if any women that actively look for fat men...even fat women.

I also know this from personal experience.

I have found recently that men are attracted to the larger ladies, when I go out I tend to get more attention than some of my smaller friends. But when younger, especially whilst at school I was considered ugly and gross, someone who deserved to die. I was told Id remain a virgin but I was bigger than average, that has stuck with me for 10 years and still hurts that someone said that. But Im starting to love my curves, especially because I know people out there accept them. But I would also like to be smaller, but not too small, I would look stupid!

This is getting into a really weird place.

I for one am looking for a can of Carlsberg. Y'all sound too dangerous for me. Much easier to please a can of beer. You just put your lips on it. =))))))))))) Meheh.
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