as complaints go this is rather trivial compared to what others have surely had to endure but something that has always got on my wick is when ive talked to a lass uptown got on wi her then she suggests coming home wi her.I turn round and say cool but im not looking for owt serious just now.

she says cool - then for two weeks running i get a txt on a nightly basis saying hey hunni how was work today

What about when they say the want somethin' serious and then disappear into nowhere...

My personal favourite is though when you've met someone, you've both realized it's not going to work, then at the end of the date they say they'll call you (I'll never understand why) and you say "oh, ok... I don't know. We'll see." and they go like... NO! I will call! for you not to hear from them again.

I've been told it's a question of ego so they don't let you end it. How lame is that?

I would like to thank a certain person for the best eight months of my life..although he already knows that..

would like to wish my Xs a merry xmass and a happy new year


[ALI G]spread da luv[/ALI G]

That is still bs, my friend, and still a question of ego. When someone makes it easier for you, it's truly childish to splatter the mud.

I personally totally dislike words without meaning behind them. If I don't feel like meeting someone again/ going somewhere with someone, etc... I surely won't insist on the opposite. In the worst case I'll say "I don't know. I'll try and make it."

I wasn't defending it, its cowardly and insensitive, just explaining the reasoning behind it.

I think that most of us are at some point guilty of not wanting to hurt the other person's feelings, not because we dont want to hurt their feelings but rather because it makes *us* feel bad doing it.
To be honest Bliss, saying "maybe...we'll see..." is just as bad as saying "sure I will defo call you" when the full intention is to hightail it outta there for good.
When I was a kid I really hated my ma saying "We'll see" because I knew she meant "No" but realise now she didnt have the firmness to say No and mean no.
With my own kids I've always just said No and meant no.
And thats how I am now with everyone.
I dont believe in pussyfooting about to save my own guilty feelings of being assertive and hurting the other person's feelings.
Better to cut to the chase and save both parties wasted time and hopes.
It actually hurts more to have to work out for myself when someone was less than honest.

You might be right, RG, but I don't see it that way. Sure, they're both ways of letting people down... But I see much more hurt in telling someone "we'll definitely do it" and even repeat that and then let them down, than to say "we'll see."

What you're sayin' bout the no is definitely correct. However I can't possibly see an = sign between "we'll definitely do it" and "we'll see", both leading to it's not going to happen (in this case).

Besides... You never know when something could really turn around and you might even like to meet/see/whatever them again. It's a sort of: I didn't like you that much, but I don't hate you either.

From your angle Bliss, I agree.
However, being on the receiving end on both, "maybe" is just as disappointing, if not more so, than "oh yes definitely" when I find out that person was just saving themselves the uncomfortableness of saying "no".
One is letting the person down gently, the other being downright dishonest, so yes from that perspective one is worse than the other, but I still maintain that being upfront honest and getting it done with is far more preferable to me personally.
Sometimes being 'let down gently' robs that person of their right to be disappointed and feeling hurt by the word no.
Although we all should have a duty not to deliberately hurt others, we are not responsible for how others respond to what we do and say.

Oh come on RG, don't lie, I bet you love to make men cry in public

Actually, in all honesty in the past when I've been in that situation when the evening has ended and I'm thinking "Oh please dont ask to see me again..." and they do...and I say "Thank you for your company this evening, but I just dont think another date is going to be of any benefit to either of us" and they always reply "Yeah I was thinking that but didnt want to hurt your feelings". No, it doesnt hurt my feelings to state the obvious. And it shouldn't hurt the other person's feelings just because I dont feel the same way they do, if he was hoping to see me again as he was too dense to notice I was luke warm all evening.... Its just an ego thing at that stage.
Dumping someone after A LOT of dates is something else again though, of course.

And u4ric, no I always feel like shite if I upset anyone.

Ooooh I havent contributed to the OP yet!!
Ok, I have something to say to CJ.
Dont suppose he will ever read this, but he knows anyway.....

After being with me for 5 years and cheating on me behind my back with someone else and letting me know by way of telling me that you and her had decided to get married, after spending my money and getting me into a lot of debt furnishing "our" little lovenest (you bastard)....DONT come crying to me years later when she wants a divorce because she's been cheating on you with your best mate.
Serves you right you git.
I dont give sympathy where it isn't deserved, that does not make me a heartless bitch, no matter what you may say.

/gosh I feel better for that!/

good on u rocketgirl... defo its true what they say 'what goes around comes around' ... my personal irritation is people who read to much into things, like say you go out with them for a couple of dates and they assume its a relationship or get all hurt if you say you not interested...get over it, thats life

I don't really hold many grudges. If I don't like someone I just won't speak to them. Sometimes silence is more damning than any attention.