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Home >> Love & Relationships >> Babies in new relationships.
23.11.2008, 19:15 quote
When a couple have started a new relationship, Becky and myself have been discussing this.
If a new relationship is working and looking to the future, we believe they should have children together, if at a child bearing age.
What do you think?
Nevermind the practicing.
23.11.2008, 19:23 quote
I disagree for many reasons - income, time, actually wanting a baby are just a few. In other words if the child won't have a good life, what is the point?
23.11.2008, 19:39 quote
How long would you wait though?
2 years, 3 years, 5 years, 7 years, 8 years, 10 years?
23.11.2008, 19:41 quote
I think you have to wait nine months for a baby to come along.
Thought God would have known that ![]()
_________________
23.11.2008, 19:41 quote
Read the original post.
It says of child bearing age.
The amount of time is also up for discussion.
23.11.2008, 19:49 quote
| snaithman wrote: |
| When a couple have started a new relationship, Becky and myself have been discussing this.
If a new relationship is working and looking to the future, we believe they should have children together, if at a child bearing age. What do you think? Nevermind the practicing. |
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Not everyone wants to have kids, where the heck does the word "should" come into it??????
For what reason do you believe people "should not" have the choice?
Half the people in this world are incapable of looking after the kids that they 'chose' to have, and those kids suffer the consequences, I really have to disagree quite strongly with your statement there.
23.11.2008, 19:53 quote
| snaithman wrote: |
| When a couple have started a new relationship, Becky and myself have been discussing this.
If a new relationship is working and looking to the future, we believe they should have children together, if at a child bearing age. What do you think? Nevermind the practicing. |
At any age, I think something like this needs time. Time to get used to each other and time to get used to the idea of another little one. You both have children from other relationships and like it or not, you also need to think about the impact on them.
I'm not sure if you are speaking about yourselves personally, but if you are, I'm really sorry if this offends, but Bex's MS also has to be taken into consideration.
Never mind the fact that a child is always hard work, even when they've left home
_________________
"Always look on the bright side of life..... tetum tetumtetumtetum....."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jHPOzQzk9Qo
23.11.2008, 19:54 quote
Well with me and Kev, we spoke about all this before we even met, not much point of going into a relationship with one who wants more kids and one who doesnt.
23.11.2008, 19:55 quote
So, if I start a new relationship when I am 55 and my partner is 70, we SHOULD have some kids, because you say so?
We'd both be 'of child bearing age' after all.
Or is there some benchmark, say I've already had 2 kids in a previous relationship and so has my old fella, so we dont have to produce more?
From what you are saying snaith, *you* should never have had that vasectomy then eh? We *should* be expecting you and Bex to produce a sprog in about 9 months time. dont tell me you are both too old, cuz biologically thats bollocks, you just choose not to, that's all....
23.11.2008, 19:56 quote
RG hit the nail on the head!!! They are exactly my thoughts on the subject. I will also add bringing a child into the world just because the couple think they 'should' is incredibly selfish on their part.
23.11.2008, 19:58 quote
children are the biggest committment people can make to each other and require so much love, care, nurturing, guidance and safety in life that really before rushing into them people should try to build a good firm relationship and lets be honest that takes time - time to truly get to know each other, to love each other and create a good foundation for the future - so many broken homes nowadays, maybe if in some of those cases time had been taken to build the relationship before having children then things would be different
23.11.2008, 20:02 quote
| rocketgirl wrote: |
| So, if I start a new relationship when I am 55 and my partner is 70, we SHOULD have some kids, because you say so?
We'd both be 'of child bearing age' after all. Or is there some benchmark, say I've already had 2 kids in a previous relationship and so has my old fella, so we dont have to produce more? From what you are saying snaith, *you* should never have had that vasectomy then eh? We *should* be expecting you and Bex to produce a sprog in about 9 months time. dont tell me you are both too old, cuz biologically thats bollocks, you just choose not to, that's all.... |
_________________
"Always look on the bright side of life..... tetum tetumtetumtetum....."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jHPOzQzk9Qo
23.11.2008, 20:09 quote
I think couples should really give this serious consideration, and neither should feel pressurised to agree with something as important as bringing a new life into the world.
If there is disagreement on this topic may be the relationship is doomed from the word go.
Obviously the older one is, there are more health risks to consider, especially if it's a first child.
I had my first child at 28 and back then, I was considered to be an old 'new mum'.... well until a lady came in who was 56!!........ Sh** I wouldn't want that to happen to me
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