bloke walks down the stree.. sees a sign saying dog for sale.. so he knocks on the door and a dog answers and says "Yes?"

the bloke says are you for sale?

dog says yes

bloke says.. that's incredible

dog says you haven't heard the half of it.. i used to be in MI6 i used to infiltrate meetings with the IRA and UDF in ireland, listen to them talking as they'd never suspect me and report back to my handlers. I was also decoreted for valour in iraq for dragging a tank crew from a burning tank and giveing them first aid..

at this point the dogs owner comes out and the bloke asks him.. your dogs amazing, why are you selling him

owner says.. he's a liar he never did any of that shit

I gotta post that one on my board if you don't mind.