Whip his tits in a last ironic gesture of hatred

Be torn apart once I set the ED/fluffy dog monster on to you.

Put him through Dr Brundle's teleport machine with the dog, watch in glee at the quivering ball of pus that emerges and laugh manically.

peel all the skin off, give you a salt bath

oh my T, you're really getting stuck into this thread You're kinda scaring me

Make you swallow the end of a very long cheese wire.
Then, when you shit it out, grab both ends and pull it taught. Then yank the shitty end up and invite the local flock of crows to feast on your warm entrails. I will be busy filming this activity for a nature documentary

force you to eat cream horns and donuts till you explode

Drown you in a bath of ass's milk with a few asps thrown in for good measure.

Have you been watching Up Pompei?