The biggest problem i have always had when dating is when she comes out with the old cliche.

You are soooo nice, im glad im your friend.

You will make someone a good bloke.

Etc etc

and then when you make a move, its like you are the worst person in the world.

any advice please...(is it good to be a bad boy and not listen to them, care, and generally be very empathetic)

My advice would be to find different women.

It may be that in your current cultural circle that nice guys not simply surplus to requirements, so you may have to change the people you mix with.

Consider a change of hobbies, socialising or whatever it takes.

I get those kind of comments often too. Women seem to like bad boys. However, its in my charecter to be nice, and I aint about to change now. I dont really think I could. Besides, if I did, they wouldnt be getting the real me, which would be bound to come through eventually, and then that would mess it up. Best to be yourself, and wait for the right one.
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I would say that I like nice men, but with that I think people have a different idea as to what constitutes a nice guy.
To me, a nice guy is respectful and loving beyond everything else, but has a mind of his own, so there's a good balance for talking around different ideas or things we would like to do together.
A nice guy doesn't always put me first, sometimes there are other priorities, and this may show his concern for others and a lovely, caring quality that to me is attractive.
My kind of nice guy has trust in me, and interests of his own and doesn't want to be with me 24/7, but when we are together we have fun and can share what we've been doing.
A nice guy doesn't always agree with me, or let me have the last word but is honest, even with the things that are hard to tell somebody.
BUT........
The sad thing is, that some men are able to appear as the Mr.Nice guy for quite a time........then change into somebody nasty that is hard to recognise as being the same person........
So what are the characteristics of the 'bad' guys that all you men think us women are attracted to? What are the qualities that you think us women like?

If someone isn't attracted to you then they aren't. Surely you can empathise? You must know someone who is attractive, friendly etc, but who you just want to be friends with? Isn't it better to meet someone who goes 'wow what a great guy!' and loves you sincerely, than trying to act in a way that you believe will be appealing?

you are what you are! u shouldnt have to change for any1 else! mr nice guy or bad boy shouldnt really matter

got to be said, some girls like bad boys, some girls like nice guys.. but some love a nice guy with a bad boy side, and i dont mean bad boy like treats you like crap! i mean bad boy who's cheeky and knows his mind. to be honest, i think a lot of people get confused between nice guys and desperate guys.

Ok, you guys keeping on talking of the "nice guys" thing... I'm a nice guy, they tell me "you're a nice guy, I'm so glad I'm your friend" bla bla bla.

Perhaps y'all don't know the common language and the common thinking. Now I hope y'all don't mind me sharin' my point of view here.

From my point of view, when a gal tells a guy: You're a nice guy, will make a good bloke for someone someday.
You're extremely nice, I'd love to have a brother like you.

And so on... They're similar to when a bloke tells a chick:

"You're very nice, would love to have a sister like you."

One might think that if someone tells someone else... You'll make a good half to someone someday... It might mean they'd like to be with them, but don't know how to put it.

That is the case in like 3 outta 50.

There is no such thing as brotherly sisterly love. If someone is attracted to someone else, there's nothin that'll stand in their way...

As for the when one makes a move and gets rejected... I think women don't want good guys to turn into bad guys... As for the good guys... I think they really can't be something they're not. You're either a good guy, a bad guy, or a half half guy... But it's all there. You can't change the way you are. Now if a good guy proves to have a naughty side too... I suppose that's very good. However it still stands that if someone digs, they dig, if they don't, they don't.

I for one would tell someone they'd make a good pair for someone someday just in a couple of cases, them being: If I got rejected, but do wish the person all the best. If the person is my friend and they're lonely. Yep. That's pretty much it. Don't think I'd tell such a thing to a guy I'm interested in and have chances with.

Now I don't know if what I said made any sense, or is connected to the topic. If it's not then pardon me, y'all know I'm mad.

Oh and one other thing there... You should look for keywords in what people tell you. In your case, the keywords are FRIEND and SOMEONE. Translation - I want you as a friend and someone ELSE will want you as something else.

Maybe this is really about boring/exciting or miserable/lively rather than good/bad.

Being "good" shouldn't mean you are less exciting because by laying off all those "vices" you should have more time to do interesting things.

So I would recommend you not to try to change yourself but instead to broaden yourself with a hobby, pursuit or activity. Mastering something new can give you a real confidence boost.

i think its been said really; but no don't try to be someone your not, i have friends that i feel the same way as you mention and don't think of them as anything elce.

somtimes the best of relationships form out of good friendships

I think most women are attracted to cheeky men that are a bit rough.

Seems to me a lot of women are attracted to men that put it about a bit and have a bit of reputation, whereas most men don't in women.

Even seen the affect that bad, cheeky men have on dating sites. Nice does seem to be thought of as boring with most women.

Funnily enough a lot of men that get a lot of attention do put over a persona of being 'bad'. Seen that in real life and on forums.

Not a nice thing to say, but I wonder if its the reason that some women seem to be attracted to men that beat women?

good point jeg, i hate how men are allowed to be 'bad'... find me a guy who likes a bit of a cheeky girl. in my experience guys hate a girl who knows her mind and can give as good as she gets.. and maybe isnt the most innocent

then again i could just have met some twats

Regarding rejection when dating, this is as natural as being being rained on when walking.

My personal definition of being a "nice guy" is about keeping my eyes open for opportunities for random good deeds, being ethical and being passionate about causes I believe in. It's all part and parcel of my love of life.

I could no more stop being "good" than I could stop reading books, newspapers and graphic novels!