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Home >> Dating >> What do women want out of me?
05.10.2008, 17:48 quote
| italianblood wrote: |
| Im so discouraged, Ive tried being nice...has not worked..Ive tried being someone else, has not worked, tried being myself, has not worked...maybe because im shy its killing my chances please! I need help...all advice is appreciated |
A lot of men will probably say they have the same problem mate. It can be hard as men often have to take the lead.
Dating sites seem to [to me anyway] encourage a certain amount of dishonesty, through pics and profiles. So it is hard to decide what kind of persona to put across.
Problem is, you are competing against people that can put up a picture and profile that is not strictly honest, or true to themselves. But these people often get caught out in time.
That can perverse and confuse what people are after or can get. Maybe lead people down dead ends. There seems to be a big turnover of dates/relationships off these sites. Turn over of dates is probably not what most people come on these sites for.
In my opinion, you should stay honest and be your self, no matter how unattractive that could come across compared to some. That way anything that comes off from these sites will be much stronger, with less disappointment.
Just keep plugging away, and something will happen. Just distance is a big problem for most people.
05.10.2008, 22:40 quote
More seriously (as opposed to my light-hearted comment earlier), there is much truth in what Wise Man Jeggae says, but although much of what I say is said in jest, there is an element of truth in it too. At 18, one should perhaps not be too hung up on the finer points and shortcomings of their dating skills, and they should be getting out & about and enjoying their youth. If you would care to take heed of an old man’s advice, try to take something positive from any encounters that you may find yourself in (even if they don’t work out), rather than negative (“I am shy”). Mixing with people and socialising generally, without the added pressure of trying to get a date, works wonders for self-confidence and overcoming shyness, which will eventually show through when approaching women with dating in mind.
| bbones wrote: |
| darkhorse a freemason? |
No, I am a shameless pimp. I lead young 18 year old men astray, those who should be sowing wild oats and indulging their raging hormones, sending them to the darkest corners of the red light district in Ottawa to fritter away their student grants on carnal delights with unkempt ladies of the night
05.10.2008, 23:36 quote
Well I do like to party and I do love being the center of the party, but I do have the help of "Liquid Courage" so the real difficult part would be to not have "Liiquid Courage" and then do it...and you know what theres a Kegger near here next week and I'll give it a try. But wait....I dont want to meat a drunk one night stand girl I kinda want to have the real deal you know? Like I envy couples on a bus or train kinda makes me smile and say "If I could be like that"
05.10.2008, 23:47 quote
| italianblood wrote: |
| Like I envy couples on a bus or train kinda makes me smile and say "If I could be like that" |
Those things can take a while to materialise. Some poeple are lucky, some not. Some reach middle age and never have that! To be honest, what you are looking for has little to do with shyness (or whatever), more to do with the fact that you just haven't met the 'right one' yet. As someone else said, the right one will turn up eventually. Don't be offended by this, but (and I am sure someone will disagree with me) it is unlikely that you will meet your soul mate at this stage of life, at best you might someone that empathises with your romantic notions and spend wonderful times together, but I suspect that as one moves into their twenties (and beyond), their goals change and they move on. Keep an open mind when you meet women, and don't have too hight expectations; as I said before, probably best to embrace what comes your way (when it does) and if it doesn't work out, at least take something positive from it with you to the next relationship.
06.10.2008, 10:06 quote
| darkhorse57 wrote: |
| At 18, one should perhaps not be too hung up on the finer points and shortcomings of their dating skills, and they should be getting out & about and enjoying their youth.
|
Does puzzle me why young seemingly attractive people under 25 waste their time on these sites.
But I think its different now then when we were young. When I was 21 I could go out and get a date almost every weekend, that was because young girls only aim in life in those days was getting dates, meeting a man. Life was much more simple, girls went out in twos and were much more open to being chatted up.
That probably changed about 15-20 years ago, when young women started to go out in big gangs and drinking pints of lager.
They dont get the experience of going out on dates, and maybe getting the social skills, as we did. The only place they can chat to women are on dating/social networking sites.
In some ways the dating is done online 
06.10.2008, 10:20 quote
| jeggae wrote: |
|
In some ways the dating is done online |
I was thinking the very same thing on Friday!
Edit: Not that I was applying that thought to my own situation, of course!
06.10.2008, 10:47 quote
| jeggae wrote: | ||
Does puzzle me why young seemingly attractive people under 25 waste their time on these sites. But I think its different now then when we were young. When I was 21 I could go out and get a date almost every weekend, that was because young girls only aim in life in those days was getting dates, meeting a man. Life was much more simple, girls went out in twos and were much more open to being chatted up. That probably changed about 15-20 years ago, when young women started to go out in big gangs and drinking pints of lager. They dont get the experience of going out on dates, and maybe getting the social skills, as we did. The only place they can chat to women are on dating/social networking sites. In some ways the dating is done online |
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06.10.2008, 11:04 quote
im young and internet dating is the biznizz!!! how the hell am i supposed to meet people like foxyhan, kizz, redilicious, RG, LV, kizz, flower tucci, etc etc.. huh? tell me how dammit! ha
06.10.2008, 13:19 quote
| bbones wrote: |
| tell me how dammit! ha |
A 3-legged dog is always good bait*** Mind you, it gets a bit tiresome answering the same question about the missing leg though.
*** Not that I use my own Three Legged One as bait, you understand! I’m sure Miss No Pants would give me clip around the ear.
06.10.2008, 13:53 quote
im pretty sure flower tucci wouldnt mind a 3 legged friend, not sure about the rest on the list tho
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