I think single by choice doesnt sound quite right, saying that when i chose to dump my bf in january (after 4 years) i knew then and know now that if i hadn't we would still be together and happy. something wasnt right, and i dont know what it was, but we were the couple who everyone always said would stay together. I don't believe i made a mistake, i believe i needed some time to be single. im not looking here for a relationship, just a flirt. But then never say never i guess. I'm not used to being single but for now, it seems ok.


But then again, im not into promiscuity really, (not for a moral reason, just its not for me) so i am celibate, but then i used to want to be a nun, so i guess im ok with that side of things.

The days of a man and women meeting each each other at 20, getting married, having kids, and living happily ever after for 60 years is probably over. Five years can be classed as a long relationship nowadays. Seems to me people are not willing to work at relationships any more, so will probably be single by choice for most of their lives.

Except for a few cases, most people now will have to get used to being single most of their lives, with a few short relationships, affairs and fuck buddies. Most people [especially people over 35ish] want relationships on their terms, with little give and take. Probably people under 30 will accept this way of life better because they will have never known long term relationships. Older people will be looking for something they once had, or maybe they think they should have.

Obviously there will be cases where people will meet, want the same things and enjoy each others company, and may well live together for a long time. But then that may not last for ever, and is probably more of a lottery.

If I do want a relationship it will probably be for selfish reasons, but then is anyone else different nowadays??

shiftygeezer wrote:

lilacrose wrote: shiftygeezer wrote: but this is a dating site lmao, ...if anyone says they are happy alone it makes me laugh cos why else are you here? ....for the gripping conversation? lol Well go ahead and laugh at me, cuz I am single by choice, and yeah I am here for the gripping conversation.....Moose said more or less what I would say....saying that, I take it on a daily basis, cuz who knows whats round the next corner? but if you are looking around that corner then your not really happy are you ?

my single life has happened due to falling for girls who dont feel the same and not having feelings for the girls who like me.until that trend stops ill be single for a bit longer.

I think some people choose the single by choice because they're tired of getting hurt... Think someone else mentioned that around here too.

Seems like there are various reasons for choosing something like this...

As for the ideal partner = best friend... Hell, if the sex wasn't like at least 70% of a relationship then I'd definitely be married to my best friend, as I previously mentioned.
_________________

it's easy to be single but no cellibate... i believe it's refered to as f**k buddies..
_________________

Myspace clicky

Facebook Clicky

i understand what your sayin jim, if your happy being single then you wouldn't be taking notice of who / what is round the corner - hyperthetically speaking like
_________________

Myspace clicky

Facebook Clicky

That's just like sayin... If you're happy with your house it means you'll never be able to see the opportunity of someone offering you a castle...

I don't think it's that black and white... It's human nature to go for the best things... Peeps are just saying that even if they're happy with being single, it doesn't mean they'll exclude the possibility of having a great relationship with someone at some point...


However... To start over again... The real problem is with loving your house as it is, then decide you should risk it all for the mirage of the castle. I think that's the main problem. When you choose to be single, should you pick a period for which you want to be single and keep everything at a low emotion level for that period, or should you risk it all when someone great comes along?

Cause some know what the mirage of the castle is... Can you actually afford to miss any castle opportunities for the period you've chosen to be single or will you let yourself drawn into the mirage once again, just hoping this time it's going to work?
I think the one managing to resist the castle is most powerful, but, again... Can you afford to live your life without falling completely in love for a while?


Hope this made some sense.
_________________