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03.09.2009, 15:48 quote

70

the thing about computer dating and getting to know new people on line when you're not at that point of wanting to give too much of your private information too soon to somebody who is basically still a stranger, is maintaining contact.

What with the unreliability of people's internet connections and computers playing up or some people only having access whilst at work or whilst not at work sometimes you can be left wondering where you stand.

Do other people find 'keeping in touch' an issue? Or are you somebody who uses 'no pc access' as an excuse when you're keeping your options open and don't want to message somebody. Or do you give your e-mail addy and telephone number to new people straight away?

Thoughts on this please

 

03.09.2009, 16:22 quote

tryst46

I don't mind giving my email addy to someone but it's back to internet connections. I'd be a little more reserved about giving out my phone number though. At least with email, you can get an addon to bounce their emails if they get obsessive or just won't take no for an answer.

I think no internet connection is not a real excuse anyway, most towns have an internet cafe or similar or even places like some Burger Kings etc that offer free wireless connection if you have a laptop. If you really wanted to contact someone online, I'm sure you have friends that have internet who would let you use it to send an email. If I got that excuse from anyone, unless I knew they were somewhere like the Aus outback where internet is almost unheard of, I'd be inclined to move on and find someone else.

 

03.09.2009, 17:16 quote

70

If the internet is the only communication then sometimes we keep missing each other as it's not always easy to arrange specific times to be on line and that's when I feel frustrated......

 

03.09.2009, 18:50 quote

eccles
Joined: 23 Jun 2006 Posts: 2193 Location: United Kingdom, England, Somerset
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I've got an O2 XDA mobile and it is fantastic for receiving and sending emails! It is a reasonable compromise in case of sporadic PC access or bad timing!
_________________
This guy is liscensed to chill, and thrill, but the opportunities to thrill are rather less than anticipated!!!!

 

03.09.2009, 20:40 quote

tryst46

mirrorpool wrote:
If the internet is the only communication then sometimes we keep missing each other as it's not always easy to arrange specific times to be on line and that's when I feel frustrated......

That's more to do with timezones and/or working hours than connectivity problems. If they are from another country, it's much harder to schedule but not impossible. If it's serious enough that you're getting upset because of lack of contact, then giving out a telephone number is quite acceptable.

4 years ago, I used to get up at 4am to chat to someone in the USA for a couple of hours before I went to work which was 9pm their time. That was just trying to work together on a project that didn't take off though. Last I heard a year ago, he and his wife were moving to Asia but I have not heard from them since, just hope they are OK.

I'd do it again if I met up with someone from another country on here without any hesitation if it got serious enough. I'd even leave the UK to be with them (immigration permitting) if we met and really hit it off since I have no ties here.

 

03.09.2009, 21:20 quote

corazones2rotos

Chatting with people from the Uk is a bit of a challenge. It's still early here when it's bedtime there. For the most part we have been able to work around it reasonably well. Not a lot of time to chat but for on the weekend when there is not work the next morning. lol

If I find that I would like to chat with someone more than the limited space that we are allowed here....I will add them to my messenger so that we can chat real time. It makes it better that way as you won't have to wait for a reply message all the time. It also helps the friendship grow I think. You can get a better feeling about what they are like when you can chat on messenger. It helps their personality come through better. As for giving out my number....I would really have to know you better for that.

If you both are willing to connect...You can always find a way. Very Happy

 

03.09.2009, 22:24 quote

70

I've not really got any one specific situation that's bugging me at the moment, but I was just reflecting on communication issues as a whole as there wasn't a thread about it that I could find. Also, I had some recent problems with my computer that meant I wasn't responding to messages as fast as normal and some people got worried if I was ok.
I suppose the written messages are the slowest forms of communication and dependent on somebody checking their mail often enough to keep in touch if there's a genuine interest, but IM is better for that next stage in getting to know someone better.

 

30.09.2009, 10:16 quote

shystef

2 months ago, i would have said if they wanted to get in touch they would, that was however as i has a great internet connection and reliable hardware, now however even though i pay for broadband the connection is terrible, and even if i plan to be online at a set time, i cant guarentee it, and i can spend ages typing out a message for it not to be delivered anyway!!
I think its just a case of common sense, depending on work commitments, time zones, reliable internet connection etc, I wouldnt let time zones, make or model Smile put me off, but i would give out a phone number sooner if the internet was an issue, just to keep lines of communication open.
I too would move to be with someone, i have had many people in the uk say but your not in england so i cant talk to you,

luckily enough airplanes are pretty frequent!
And if i am in the UK for a limited time, i aint gonna spend it catching up with those that have ignored me whilst away, but spend the time with those i have regular contact with.

you dont get nowt for nowt,

 
 
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