slight rant-

i used to be a real "get lashed and pull" kinda bloke, and a bit of a lady killer to boot, then i got viciously dumped, and have been unable to chat a lass up for almost one and a half years

It kinda came ot a head today, when i was helping my collegue move a new prototype, and he goes- "go on then" pointing to the attractive young lady -AYL- in the office next door "ya would, wouldent you?"

balls, just what i need, i went RED ie crimson.

to sum up, i have become so bad that i now end up bloody shaking and stammering like a bad un every time there is a AYL that i dont know within twenty feet.
So i have now finished uni, and am so crap with women, i am growing dodgy facial hair, just to make me think that im less likey to become accosted by an AYL.
Then i did the one thing i said i would never do- join a dating website--nooooo-


rant over- i imagine this will not be an unfamiliar story.

It happens.

I have never been that sort of person..but last night...oh god. I was flirting with every single guy near me. I lost my shyness...I need it back before I cause myself more shame!

lol- cant beat a spot of duplicity- the good old dastard whereby men who get lots of sex are studs, women who do the same are sluts-hmmmmm anyhoo...

I got 3 guys numbers, and swapped underwear with a guy, too.....oh god.

I've ALWAYS suffered a major lack of confidence with the ladies. The more i fancy them, the more red and shaky i become. Then i fuck up the conversation by speaking at 100mph and can't string a sentence together, at which point they say something like "weirdo!!" or "asshole!" and then storm off.

To be fair, i've never really *attracted* women. I never seem to catch one gazing at me and even in town, etc, most women would rather look down at the ground rather than smile. I'm not deformed or mentally unstable (yet!) so i've always assumed that i'm not attractive as i can't see any other reason for ignorance. Needless to say, i've been single 2yrs. Even my last ex was someone i worked with and it took her 18months+ to convince me she fancied me. Maybe i'm just shite at reading body language? lol

I love the internet cos i can be ME. I can say what i'm really thinking and not worry so much about being rejected. Trouble is, one of these days i'm gonna have a gorgeous local girl mail me and then.......just maybe......i'm gonna shit myself or fall deeply in love....

i dont mean to detract from what you are saying, but there is the added impetus for men, which is if they are not seen to be activly humping everything within a certain radius, then you are a faggot, its especially bad for myself, as i work in an engineering an computing environment where of course, they are the bunch of big grls blouses you would expect.

I get the piss taken out of me on a regular basis but i don't take it to heart. If i got all stroppy, they'd wind me up even more, so i get the upper hand with something like "at least i won't get cheated on". Seeing as almost every man i know has cheated/been cheated on, they soon shut up. And when they start saying i'm gay, i act all camp and say "well you better not bend over then, honey" or "pass the soap, superstar" (remember the wycleff adverts?!). I never take things too seriously, it can cause too much stress.

To be honest, i quite LIKE being single now. I do my own thing and at my own leisure without the pressure of having to be somewhere to meet "the missus" at a specific time. Maybe i'm selfish, maybe i've just adapted to being a bachelor. When i look at the state of some people's relationships, i consider myself lucky to be free of all that.

i used to have massiver confidence issues, then they all stopped for a few years and now they've come back again. its not a nice place to be in, i find alcohol helps.