My thoughts are about sharing personal details such as email addresses, mobile numbers, photos and where you live. I'm very vague about my location. But sometimes i think if i have details of someone else it should only be fair to share my details. And at other times common sense prevails and saying no is the safer option - afterall not everyone is honest and sane. Also I reckon it should be my decision, when i feel like handing out my details I probably would, only if i'm happy to do so.

And i know there's always some risk when you do share details but how would you reduce it?

Also noticed i had a lucky escape, when i do say no and explain my reasons, if they do get the message then it'll be fine however you get the ones who appear to be understanding (and i mean really genuine) then they ask again, like a mobile number isn't private. That is one good example of how to check for any dodgy types-i'm being polite. I mean if someone's being quite pushy via their messages then imagine what they'll be like if you'd meet up and they know where you live..etc.

And it makes me think of my ex in a positive light, he turned out to be horrible but at least he is harmless. Phew i feel much better now.

Sue has said many a time that you can NEVER be too cautious, and I have to say I agree 1000 %

It is rare for me to give out my email address, I even generated one, especially for people, whom I cant class as friends, or family.

I think you can only go with your instinct - gut feelings or even mood at the time, I know emails are easier to block, then texts and calls; as with my network, they will only block a number with a crime number.

If its meant to be, why rush? ....

Police are keen on cautions, especially if you ever want one... simply crouch down in front of a Police Officer, going 'oink oink' on a weekend evening out, and you'll soon get a caution for free... maybe even 2 if you're lucky...

Thank for that Shystef.
I use a few email accounts already and I'm definitely in no hurry either.

Scriptwriter.
I will bear that in mind if I'm ever after a caution, so far the police don't mind me, i need to try that with Sting. And I will win in war of the worst puns.

Sting? Try 'The Stig' - he wears a helmet and doesn't sing with a sore throat...!

Its always best to be cautious. Never give out personal details online. if ur going to meet them make sure u take a friend with u. make arrangements to meet them through the site not by any other means. If u like them after the date then u can give them ur number. But its best to wait till after u have had a few dates before u do that. There r a lot of fake ppl online pretending to be something their not. Like guys pretending to be girls. Not telling the truth about age. A freind i had yrs ago had a 12 yr old daughter who went online and said she was 21 and wanted to meet guys for love. So always take a friend with u when u meet someone. Even guys who r meeting girls cause u never know who will turn up. Its best to be safe than sorry.

I'm glad to hear a man warning other men, because I know of a few men who've had trouble. This is just one example:-

Last year a male friend of mine got arrested for absconding with a minor he'd met on the internet. She'd told him she was older but was just 15, he went to meet her in her home town and then went to take her to London where he lived. He was arrested on the train (I think it was) and that's when he found out her true age, but he had all his computer gear taken away and everything looked seriously bad for him. What saved him in the end was the evidence on his computer that she'd told many lies and being she looked older, the case was all dropped, but it was a nightmare for him for ages.

So don't just think it's women that need to be careful.

By the way, for those of you who remember my friend's meeting with a guy from a dating site that had murdered his wife, she has since found love with a lovely guy and has just moved in with him and they are really happy together.
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Never date a man who says: 'Daddy hurt my bottom' - whilst he's cutting welts up his arms in front of you over lunch. And never date a woman who says: 'Can I call you daddy whilst you hurt my bottom and cut welts up my arms' ------- They're both usually a challenge in the dating stakes but good material to draw upon when method-acting in your own amateur Youtube version of: 'Jubilee'...

I see stories online everyday about guys meeting girls they met online who lied about their age. It makes it really bad for the guy for the rest of their lives. In most cases the guy will be charged cause the law believes that a woman would never start anything sexual with a man unless forced too. They also believe underage girls would never willingly meet an older man. Its rare for a case to be dropped. so the man ur on about was very lucky. I found out the hard way. A freinds daughter who was 2 weeks short of 18 started sending me dirty txt,s. I told her to stop. Next thing i know im getting arrested for sending her dirty msgs when i didnt. I had all the txt.s still on my phone to prove i didnt. But i was charged and found guilty anyway. The court said she would of only sent me those txt,s if i forced her too and nothing i said would make any difference. Its also a criminal offence to send anything of a sexual nature over a phone line no matter how old u r. In my case the evidence was tampered with. But my laywer refused to look into it. My phone had all the evidence to prove i didnt but i was refused to use it in court. The phone they said was hers had loads of dirty txt,s on with my number on them. But it wasnt her phone and all the msgs said FWD/E on them. FWD means they were forwarded to that phone from another phone. When u do that the original senders number will still be there. E means the msg was edited. I knew they were not what i sent cause they were full of sexual swear words. I dont use those words at all. I dont swear full stop and hate hearing ppl swear. I got done for misuse of telecommunictions. I was kept in prison for 5 months without charge while they worked out what to charge me with. They finally gave me 4 months in prison and a 3yr community order and 5 yrs on the love offenders register. I got released from prison when i got sentenced cause i spent 5 months on remand. Ive spoken to sevral lawyers and judges who said it should never have been taken to court and they reviewed the evidence and said its clear i was innocent but they wont dismiss the charge or sentence. So i have to live with that for the rest of my life. The law says innocent until proven guilty. in my case it was guilty until proven innocent but not allowed to prove i was innocent. They wont remove the charge cause they would have to pay me compo for wrongfull arrest and imprisonment. Its why i am warning all men about online dating. Always find out as much as u can about a girl before u meet. If u meet take someone with u. Never give out ur number till ur sure about age. Never be alone with them till u see proof of age. A lot of girls can pass as being a lot older these days.

Well cliff, I hope men will bother to read your post and heed your warning, as your story reveals just how far some people will go in lying or setting up a situation.
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If you were on remand, why was bail refused? For an alleged misuse of telecommunications act offence, it is rarely remand-worthy and is typically a magistrates court business, comprising of an eventual fine.

If the phone you used was on contract, then there is a greater chance of allegations sticking but… the burden of proof is in proving it was you sending the texts, in the same way as if you had challenged alleged speeding offences - a photograph of a number plate does not mean: a) you were driving, or b) that someone with the same model car merely hadn’t copied your number plates and put them on their own car.

You do have a right of appeal, if you feel matters have not been handled correctly. You can contact The Law Society for advice on the best way to complain about a solicitor, or the Bar Council regarding a barrister. You can also complain to the Police. Were you represented in court, or only advised prior to hearing/trial? Did you plead guilty? If you did, end of story.

If the texts were forwarded/edited, I presume that people’s telephone records were subpoena-rd for interrogation, as well as forensics examining people’s phones? I presume the CPS had this done, and that your solicitor appointed independent checks to be done as well, to compare against their findings?

If you made any verbal admission to any part of it at all, to an Officer, whether under arrest or not, then that is all that was probably needed. Again, end of story.

Had you lost your phone in a pub, and got it back a week later - after someone else had been using it to set you up with?

Likewise, the female in this issue would have to prove it was her replying to you, and, that it was her phone/sim and owned by her - and, that it was not a mate of hers who is 18 or older or even her mum/dad aged 60 replying to you for a laugh. Was it on contract? Did someone else own it? Were the actual owners monitoring it, maybe even doing it?

And how can you have been deemed to have ‘forced’ someone to text you? Were you holding her arm up her back? Did you make threats?

If you were on pay-as-you-go, the CPS typically do not have a name and address to tag to the phone, unlike having a land-line in your name and you being accused of making nuisance calls. But either way, even that’s not enough for them to go off. Did your solicitor request the actual tapes of your interviews by Police, not just typed transcripts from them? Have you heard them yourself to make sure you have not been misquoted?

I would have thought that all that would have happened is that you would be moaned at for letting someone else use your phone, for reckless matters. Or, that the female could have simply set you up out of malice and for a ‘joke’. Was it entrapment? Was she mentally retarded and deemed not responsible? Were mental assessments done? Had you been cautioned previously? Were any injunctions in place regarding direct/indirect contact between you and her? Was her mother an ex gf of yours? What's her family like? Has she/they done this before? Was she forced to do this to you?

The issue I guess here is - if you were grooming her for love, or, just flirting, or whether even you/her were doing anything at all? If the texts were forwarded, who were they forwarded by? Was the date and time on her/your phone correct? Was the mobile network servers examined and their maintenance/servicing/back-up services checked? Were the texts/calls intercepted by the Police’s own monitoring systems? Or did you blindly (or were given allegedly wrong advice to) just admit it, just to be nice and to help out in seemingly doing the right thing?

As we know, the hetro/homosexual age of sexual consent, and for main employment, marriage (with written consent), joining the Army and even property owning is 16 (England/Wales). 16+ is not a kid. For text messaging/email correspondence it is though 17. And it is 18 for voting weird people into parliament. If you go to a pub/club on a Friday night you will find loads of 16/17yo women hitting on guys in their 30’s, 40’s even 50’s and even hitting on middle-aged women (!) too, in the same way as blacks date whites, bisexuals date lesbians and short men date very tall women. Ageism is redundant nowadays, regardless of what various people’s views are on demographics.

Personally, I would go to another solicitor or to a free law advice centre and see what can be done, or your local MP. We can only offer suggestions on here based on what you’ve written, and presumably, the case was finally heard in a crown court and not a magistrates court, due to the custodial sentence mentioned? Did you opt for a crown hearing immediately, or was it referred from the magistrates? If your solicitor was not asking all these questions, it suggests you entered a guilty plea - or am i wrong?

If you look closely at various profiles on here, you can clearly see they are traps with an Officer drinking coffee sat behind them. I report all scam profiles, under-agers, or those that just ‘feel’ odd, like passport/bank details seeking criminals.

My advice is, don’t message anyone unless they’re over 100 years old - and then you’re safe, well... maybe! Hope you make the right decisions as to what to do regarding what sounds like a pretty crappy situation all round. Or, just put it behind you and leave it.

My lawyer was the one who didnt want me to get bail. When magistates wanted to dismiss the case my laywer demanded it went to crown court. He aslso refused to check the evidence. Cause of medical problems i couldnt go into the court room so didnt know what he was doing till it was to late. The CPS did more to defend me than my laywer did. Also had a bent cop on my back. He is still harrasing me know even though i got a restraing order out on him. Think he is trying to get at me cause i reported him years ago for pulling me over and demanding money off me for not wearing a seat belt. I was a taxi driver and their except from seat belts cause it can be used as a weapon by passengers against the driver. IE pulling the belt back to pin the driver in the seat so they can rob them.

Personally, I would seek independent advice at a (criminal not civil) law centre about it, or arrange to see your local MP's councillor. The difficulty is in getting advice for free, and, from people who are fully familiar with the areas of applicable law and complaints procedures.

A solicitor can offer free advice, but they are under pressure of time, typically 30 minutes. However, a solicitor would be my first port of call. If you use one, use a big firm, or one that has a speciality in the area of alleged offence involved.

A suggestion first would be to write out what happened from start to finish - every single detail that you remember, from first hearing of the alleged offence, to the case, and what followed thereafter.

Under the Freedom of Information Act, you may request copies of most documents hold by the Courts and Police ( http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/Governmentcitizensandrights/Yourrightsandresponsibilities/DG_4003239 ).

You may also request copies of the documentation your representation holds on file relating to you. There may be a charge for photocopying and postage for it.

Then, compile a list of issues.

Then, make an appointment.

It may not be wise to disclose any more about the details on here, as it's not a private forum.

You could always speak with a journalist (national newspaper, not a local one) about it - who may be interested in the story and in pursuing things. But it means you'd be going public, and they do not have your interests at heart - just the story.

There are a few links on-line that may be of use:

http://www.marymonson.co.uk/sexual-offences.php

http://www.harleyandco.co.uk/Services.htm

http://www.scribd.com/doc/14669643/Consent-in-love-Offences

@ Scriptwriter. You are a very knowledgeable guy! You seem to be all spammed up on the legalese lingo too, if I get any snags with my online meetings, can I ping you for advice?

I'd prefer cash...!

As for cautious, condoms are for wimps!