I am 20 and my partner 27. We have been together for over a year. I chaeated at the start of the realationship and he uses this as his excuse for going back to the drugs he blames me. We always argue now and i stoped drinking for him. Everytime i ask him to stop taking it he says i need to take it as you have driving me to it.

He already has a son to his previouse partner and i dont think he wants children where as i would love to settle down and have a family. i just dont know what to do.

i would ask my friends but they already dont like him and would be happy if anyone had any opinions

ashley

The answer should be clear...


Get rid of him.

The fact that he's blaming you for him taking drugs says it all. You stopped drinking for him - so surely he must be willing to give up the drugs for you.

If you cheat on a releatiobship at any time it's a bad sign and to do it at the start well it doesn't put the whole thing I a good light.

Stack up what you get out of the releationship against what you don't.

Being in something may be a way to stop you being alone but it's far more damaging in the end.

Problem with these sites is you only hear one side.

Did you really stop drinking for him?

A women cheating on a man, especially if he really likes her, is probably the worse thing that can happen to a man. Probably worse then for a women, but obviously that is highly debatable. It can be hard for some men to take, and get over.

The fact you are on a dating site, for whatever reason, might not good. But that depends why you are on here. So maybe he should be getting rid of you. You've only been together for just over a year.

Sorry if this seems harsh, but its what coming over to me from what you said, and it doesn't sound like a partnership made in heaven.

Thanks for the replys i completly agree with everyone and see it from both sides.

Apart from you giving up the drink, you haven't mentioned anything POSITIVE about your relationship. That would bother me.

Stop trying to find the bad side of you to outweigh his good side. I know it sounds confusing but it sounds like what you are actually doing.

Yes you cheated on him, that was wrong. But what is even worse, is that you're in a commited relationship with someone who can't look past the past and uses it against you. Don't get me wrong I don't endorse cheating, but when one partner cheats on the other, the couple as a whole has to decide to either stay together and put it completly behind them or break it off entirely. It doesn't work any way in between.

You need to break it off with him. Not only is he holding the past against you but now since that's getting old, he's trying to blame an addiction of his on what happened a year ago. This is not the kind of man you want to be with let alone have a family with. He isn't strong enough to move on from a past blow and he's not man enough to accept his own addiction and downfall.

Yes love is grand, love is a powerful thing but every rose has it's thorns and these ones could bring you to a very dark place my friend. I think this is a time where you need to listen to your mind and your parameters of self respect.