I don't know if others feel the same, but being active on the Forums feels like a bit of a community and I tend to forget just how many people look/read but never join in............Y?
So, my question is:-

Has anybody felt like they need to be careful what they say or use it differently because they discover someone else they know has access to their thoughts and shared personal things via the discussion boards?

I ask this as I know someone who has joined flirtbox and I've started to get a bit nervous about whether I've mentioned things that I'd sooner them not know about.

hmmmm, actually never thought about that. But then again everyone who knows me is fully aware how twisted i am anyway lol

JUST NEW TO THIS BUT NEVER REALLY THOUGHT OF HAVING TO SELECT WHAT I SAY. WHICH IS STRANGE FOR ME AND MY NATURE. GUESS EVERYONE IS DIFFERENT AND GUESS IT IS HARDER IF YOU KNOW A FEW PEOPLE THAT HAVE JOINED AND MAY START MAKING ASSUMPTIONS ABOUT YOU TOTALLY UNDERSTAND THAT MYRIAD

Funnily enough, I was thinking about this a couple of weeks ago, one of the reasons I use the forum less and less.

I think it is fair to say that although this is a discussion forum, it is attached to a dating site, and the main reason for being here in the first place (although reasons for staying change over time) is predominantly dating. So, with this in mind, I can quite honestly say that there are some women on FB who I wouldn’t contact, even though their profile appeals to me, because of things they have said on the forum, or views they have expressed here, or personal characteristics that have emerged through their posts.

I think a lot of people forget that when they interact with others on the forum, a relatively small community of people that they have built a rapport with, other people who never use the forum are looking at their profile with interest but are also reading their (often very personal) thoughts and views on the forum.

Of course, I am sure there are people who feel the same about me (or other people on the forum – and lets face it, there is probably a core of regular posters that numbers less than 40).

When I first came to FB I held my tongue a little, for the reasons DH has already stated. Its second nature I suppose and its something a lot of people do in 'real life' when it comes to dealing with the opposite sex. I'm sure we've all been involved with someone where the real them has only come out (sometimes to our dismay) after months of knowing them. A lot of people stick up a facade because they're afraid of being disliked or seen as unattractive, so its only natural that they behave the same way on a forum.

However, nowadays I really don't give a shit. I can't be bothered to hold back (at least when I can summon the effort to post), unless its going to get me a ban or offend someone I have a little respect for.

If anyone takes a dislike to you for what you've posted then big deal. If I were looking for someone on here I'd much rather get a feel for what they're like on the forum rather than take the time and effort to get to know them in person. After all, isn't that what internet dating is all about; convenience? If nothing else its easier on your bank balance if you don't have to take them on a couple of dates to find out they're an odious retard.

So no, I won't be losing any sleep over what I've posted, and neither should anyone else. Internet personas should be left at the door at a place like this. You shouldn't be afraid of giving people a glimpse into your character. Good or bad. A bit of conviction, even if its misguided, is an admirable trait.

No regrets for me. And I've been a proper bellend at times.

I find quite a few of people that message me on the dating side have read my posts, as they comment on them when they message me. For some reason they think i am quite a direct person, dont know what gave them that idea.

The way i see it, if any prospective dates read your posts, they are only reading about what you are like, your personality, your likes your dislikes etc, so if you plan to go on a date they will already know alot about you Thats presuming you are being honest on here and not being someone you cant be in real live ????? I am the same on here as i am in real life, so if they dont like what they read then it's not meant to be .............. x

If people wanna say stupid things and don't get caught with it, they usually get fake id's. If they don't, it means they either take responsibility for their words or are mentally challenged. Other than that... If you've expressed yourself freely here and take responsibility for the things you've said and that leads to some not involved parts not liking you then... Uhm... Whatever?
As for personal exposure, as I said... If you don't wanna expose your true identity when saying some stuff then you get a fake one?

I wish I didn't start postin on this. I'm losin track of my thoughts again. Never mind. I didn't post though I did.
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I treat this forum as a bit of fun, its not very often i get embroiled in a deep discussion about something. Just a bit of light entertainment!

Thanks everyone for your considered opinions.
I do know of someone else who had a few issues to deal with when work colleagues found him on the forums, and he stopped using them for ages.

In my case, I'm like an open book wherever I am, but I hadn't really considered that I might end up on the same site as a close relative. So they would know me very well, my views and the kind of mood of the day comments....However, I just can't remember if I'd made any references to them that would link us together in any detrimental way......for either of us.
At least we don't look alike.