what do you think to the opinion that nice guys finish last?

should you be less nice and alittle mean or do things work out in the end?

some people say arguinng is good in a relationship, im not so sure

In my experience nice guys always finish last. You're basically sticking a huge neon sign above your head that says 'Use Me'.

This might be a pessimistic outlook on things, but from what I've seen so far it tends to be the truth.

so we shouldn't be nice then ?

Its true they do!

Chikhai i think nailed it again as always!
Nice guys invariably finish last because as much as people think your nice, thats all you ever will be, youll be pigeonholed! Women will pick up on that too and youll just be "a friend"
Ive tried to be that nice guy, and ive failed at just about every hurdle there is to being a normal person, the fact is, its not natural for me to be so nice! So people instantly think "whats wrong with him"!
I think you need to be nice sometimes, but having some bad/naughty parts will give you an edge and make you stand apart. So go for it, be bad!

i suppose been forgiving is the worth thing to do because you will forgive no matter what.

e.g someone you love cheats on you, you can forgive them, thow it might be hard. but whats to stop them doing it again?

theres the easiest example i can think up

When are you men going to realise that not all women are the same and we all do look for different qualities in a partner??

Being pessimistic about things isnt too appealing
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what is with all this negativity on the boards...

you all keep going on about how women pigeonhole you, but its you that doing it... none of the women are.

why are you all doubting yourself?

I love nice men best as long as they are interesting aswell.

I agree nice guys do finish last. I think of myself as a nice guy but have been single for years whereas mates who have a "not so nice" side always get the girl. Its not because Im too shy or dont have the chat, I just think Im too nice... I hear girls constanly complaining about their boyfriends and cant believe they stick with someone who can be such a "prat".

Although most girls will deny it, I think they really do like a guy that will be a bit abusive and dont really want the "perfect guy" they always go on about. I am not a total walkover, I like to be nice to people but am not a sissy... I ride a motorbike, enjoy boxing, hunting etc but am nice to girls... I like to treat others as I would like to be treated but girls do see me as just a friend!... Maybe I',m just ugly!!!! lol

When I first came on the forums some 9 months ago or so, there were one or 3 women constantly ripping guys to shreds. I said my words, made a few complaints and it calmed down. Seems the tables have been reversed and whereas it's nice to have a healthy balance, it is now getting too much again.

This is a dating site. There are both men and women that abuse these sites but the vast majority of the regulars in the forums are all here for the same reason BUT it doesn't mean we're going to be any more compatible in a relationship than any other large group of people.

If the regulars were users of people, would they be here?

Come on everyone, lets just get on with each other and stop behaving as tho' you were in a primary school playground

Id prefer a nice guy 2 a bad guy

Yes, this may all seem like sweeping generalisation, but you can only truly base your opinion on what you have experienced so far. If the majority of that experience is negative then of course your opinion is going to be coloured that way. That doesn't mean your outlook can't change (for better or worse), but it takes time, and the longer it takes the harder it is to change.

I'm quite sure that women are getting sick of reading posts like this, but its no different from the posts demonising men for prowling dating sites when they're married, only wanting sex, sending pictures of their cock etc. The difference is that men, in general, are quite backward in coming forward about their feelings when it comes to relationships. We're not supposed to give anything away because we're the big strong alpha male who cannot be phased by anything. So when we do we don't endear ourselves to the opposite sex, at least on some primal level anyway.

What I've learned so far is something of a paradox; women see nice men as a resource to be tapped (whether that's a guy who buys them things, is a shoulder to cry on or lavishes them with compliments and generally gives them the attention they crave) but they're seemingly attracted to arseholes because they give the impression that they're strong and in charge and that big old alpha male that their genes are crying out for, and only later when they're in a relationship with them do they realise that 'no, he really is just an arsehole' do they bemoan the fact that men are such evil creatures.

There are exceptions to the rule on both sides, but they're rare, and good luck to anyone looking for them.

So yeah, that's my take on it, and I'm not claiming to represent all of the guys on here. Though I wouldn't be surprised if the scenario I've described isn't familiar to a few of them.