In an ideal world Mr DH will have rubber sheets!

I would be a size 12-14 ......... have a personal hairdresser, money in the bank, unbreakable rabbits, and kids that weren't cheeky

I would be hung like a horse not a hamster

I'd marry my dream-boy.

I'd be a young man of 35 again

Elvis would be alive and all Elvis Impersonators would be dead.

Ok, that was stolen from Johnny Carson (though it was originally If life was fair...) but it still stands.
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One egg giggles, two eggs dance, they giggle and gaggle until they see Grant. Grant says "Hello, can I giggle too?" They say "No, you old frog. Go dance in the loo!"

I'd be content with my life!!

Finding beauty would be a matter of waking up

In an ideal world I would now be asleep with my right leg in between the thighs of...

Well, that's the way I like to sleep in an ideal world..