I really want to get married again.

or

He shouldn't say to the girl " Interesting choice of outfit. Hmmm"

or this one which has been said to me this week

I know you'll make a great wife.

Ok, guys RUN!!!!!!!

or...... "You must be tired from running round my head all day long so why don't you take off your pants and have a rest between my thighs."


This did not go so well, that I know of.

You look nice. Now bend over.

"Hi i'm Dave, *grabbin crotch* and this is dick"

yep, someguy actually tried that as a chat up line once LMAO
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Not tonight, I have a cist...........

Just got fired, would you mind paying?

You didn't know this, but I've been watching you all day....

So what's your favorite tree ?

What a coincidence, I own that exact same blouse!

My last 2 relationship ended badly & with restraining orders

Would you mind if I asked the waitress out? Just in case this doesn't work out...

"Do you mind if we don't sit down? Only I've only just taken my suppository."

especially if followed by;

"The doctors say I don't need it, but I just like taking them, y'know"

never, EVER say

"you know stoney's a good pal of mine, we exchange tips on how to f--"

2 reasons:
a)instant date faliure.
and
b) you can never complete the sentence - the girl always stuffs your face with whatever's most harmful at the moment.

(Congratulations to me on my longest surviving thread, lol )

how about....

" hey, how dya fancy joining me at one of my friends (random acquaintances) parties at some club in london which might/might not move on to some degenerates shithole in a squat/garage/charitable institution drinking cheap cider or meths, while my 'friends' and I try to 'seduce' you, using our well-proven 'techniques' which 'honestly' dont involve any rohypnol, as long as you're idiotic enough and easily influenced/quickly drunk/have rock-bottom standards/low self-esteem etc etc........."

F*ck me ... you look nothing like the pic you put on Flirtbox