Depends on if her buttocks are covering your ears at the time, you may not be able to speak without the aid of a snorkel...!

Your behaviour is rather worrying from the outside and does seem controlling, but then again I've been in these kind of situations, and it just goes round in a circle at the end of the day and you forget where or who it all started from. She's sneaking around behind your back, your being controlling...did your controlling nature push her to it? Or has her actions driven you to be so controlling about her.
It's totally not a good situation to be in, but i know when time and love is involved it's so hard just to walk away. My advice to you would be to sit her down and calmly try and get the truth from her, if she doesn't want to be with you, let her go, your better off. If she tells you the truth but does want to be with you, have some time spent apart for a bit, so you can relax and become yourselves again. Then if you really want to be togetehr and make it work, get some help, counselling or something and learn to trust each other and everything again. It might not work, but if you two really love each other and want to be togetehr, it's worth a shot. x

If they ever lie to you once... regardless of what it is over - whether minor or major, immediately end the relationship/marriage. You will never ever fully trust the person again, and the anxiety, doubt and second-guessing further down the line just isn't worth it. Be ruthless, you're worth better than a liar. And if you can throw her handbag out after her so that it flies over her head as she's begging and sobbing to come back, that's even more fun - followed by her dildos in a clear plastic bag, for the neighbours to see!!!!!!!