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16.07.2010, 12:22 quote

sc0ttie

Depression = reflection...which should = change.

It's when you don't change that depression becomes so very negative. Depression is a natural part of human behaviour and we all experience it in our lives at some point.

 

15.08.2010, 16:06 quote

sarah448


Well that is the thing isn't it. People who do not have clinical depression do not understand what it is like. I was diagonised with depression when I was 15 (so ten years now) and the hardest thing about it (well one of the hardest things) is that other people really do not understand. Sometimes they try, and they really think they do understand - but in reality I think that unless you have clinical depression yourself it is something you will never full understand.
I mean really somedays I just don't want to get out of bed or do anything, talk to anyone, or even eat. Why? I have no idea! it really is a chemical inbalance in my situation and it is something I have little control over. Trying to find my soulmate seems to be a very difficult task because guys don't know how to cope with someone with depression - it is something they don't understand and if I am sad they try to 'fix it'!! yeah I mean serioulsy telling me it is ok and cheer up is exactly what I need right?! wrong!!
this discussion is great! it's nice to read other peoples comments and to write something myself.
and yes I understand don't wanting to look in a mirror.

 

06.05.2020, 06:08 quote

cliff60
Joined: 21 Aug 2010 Posts: 42 Location: United Kingdom, England, Hampshire
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depression is a state of mind. everyone has it at some time in their lives. like if a death happens to someone u care about or ur relationships breaks down.
Those r mild and temp.

But some of us have had depression all r lives. i was 1st diagnosed with depression when i was 2 years old acording to my social services file. That was cause my mum decided she didnt want me anymore and put me up for adoption. Dad refused to let me be adopted so i got put into foster care and made a ward of the state.

Foster mum didnt care about me only how much money she got for taking me in. Put on the at risk register when i was 3 when my foster mum told social services give her money to take me on holiday or they will leave me home alone for 2 weeks when they went on holiday. No love from family or foster family made the depresiion even worse.

Im 60 now and still struggling with depression. i can go for months not being able to go out anywhere. sometimes i cant even open the door when someone knocks. Dont cook for months on end just 1 sarny a day.
Cant handle relationships due to fear of getting rejected and hurt all over again.
When ive been in relationsships ive been very withdrawn and not able to show my feelings.

prob is by the time i feel secure in a relationship and start showing my feelings its too late and things fall apart due to me not opening up fast enough. that starts the downward spirral all over again.

it takes me years to get over a relationship breakup.
last 1 took me 15 years to recover from. Still not sure if i want to get into another relationship or not but im getting very lonely on my own and need to try and get back into the dating game.
Prob is i tend to get attached very fast which is why i get hurt when things dont workout.

Think its cause i never had the love of a family when i was growing up and look for someone who will give me that love but always end up with the wrong person who doesnt understand my needs.

Found out a couple of years ago i have aspergers which also causes depression and supreses ur emotions. Also i have social phobia which is another part of aspergers. poor comuniction skills another effect of aspergers.
I just dont know how to express my emotions. Very rarely laugh. dont know what it feels like to be happy. often break down in tears when i see something sad in a film or TV show. Only emotions i seem to experiance r the sad ones never the happy ones.
When my x told me she was preganant with my son i felt nothing at all. When i held him for the 1st time i felt nothing. When she ran off taking my son with her i cried for months and wanted to die. Thats the one im still recovering from. every year on his birthday i breakdown and cry cause i cant be with him as i dont know where he is. He is 15 now and havnt seen him since he was 3 months old.

1st time i knew anything about depression was when i was 18 when i had a mental breakdwon after getting gang raped when i was in the army. spend several months in a catatomic coma in hosptial. told i had severe depression with suicidal tendancies.
Was given a medical discharge but my unit refused to let me go as it was a special forces unit and were under strenght and had orders to deploy to northern Ireland for 6 months. Got discharged after return back with a few losses to the unit from a car bomb i got wounded in. recalled in 82 for the falkand war against doctors orders. where i got wounded again. depresiion hit me hard after that. Every relationship failed just as i was recovering from depression so back on the downhill slope again.

Makes me mad when someone says they r depressed after breaking up with their partner or losing their job. They havnt a clue what real depression is like.

It effects u all ur life not just a few weeks or months. stops u working and stops u enjoying life. try and imagine what its like to not know what happines is or what fun is.

 
 
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