my ex who is also my daughters father has decided that he wants to start seeing her aftwer 3yrs he has kidnapped her when i dumped him beat me threw things where she was when she was a baby etc n he also has a new baby with somebody else.Because of the violence he was advised to see a supervision centre re contact when i finally became strong enough to leave him but he never did. My daughter has special needs and i dont in this case think it a good idea at all, i would never trust him with her and i feel it may mess her head up, views anyone?

i honestly think that its not a good idea at all, just because 3 years have passed, it does not mean he has changed. you and your daughter have been through enough. it was his desision to do those things, so i say no. dont let him anywhere near her.

thats what i thought too, thanks kemal

I wouldn't let him near her either hun, even in a contact centre its easy for him to put on an act like he is the all caring father, but at some stage he would have unsupervised access and I just wouln't trust him.

yeah i would be very wary about it all to be honest.. and personally i would go the court way to get full custody, as if hes still violent he will prob go mad if you dont let him see her

he isnt on the birth certificate nor has he any parental rights i didnt think about him kicking off here will be vigilant and call police if he turns up

Louby, personally I wouldnt let him anywhere near her

Sorry but this man sounds and acts like a total creep. The things he's done in the past are unacceptable. I wouldn't let him anywhere near your daughter for both your safety and hers.

A leopard never changes its spots after all.

If he's not on the birth certificate, he has no legal rights over her.

Do what you feel is right for your daughter Louby. As she is the centre of all this, it is she that comes first.

If he is her father, then he deserves to see her. However I agree with Dodgy999, get a solicitor involved. If he's been violent in the past, then he might still be. And no I don't condone whatever actions he has taken in the past. But he may well have changed, and he does deserve to see her.

However, if she doesn't want to see him, then fight for her decision. If you personally stop them from seeing each other, then she may well resent you, for putting her father in a bad light. Ask her if she wants to see him, and if she does, get a solictor involved. If not, tell him that she doesn't want to see him, and your not gonna force her to.

Just my own views on it mind.

Louby, my friend is going through this right now. She takes them to an SC and (her choice but I think she's a dick for doing it) she would let him back in their lives.

Yet another reason to feel proud to be a man. Any wonder decent guys get down when in competition with so many "good guys" out there.